𝐇𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐋𝐘 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐒 - 𝐃.𝐌.

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 123

I pick Hiraeth up in my arms and carry her out of the room and out onto the balcony. It's dark outside and every star in the sky is perfectly visible.

"Your mommy is the love of my life. But when you were born, I found another one."

"Who?" Hiraeth asks.

"You." I smile because she had to ask. "And that means i'll love you forever, no matter what."

"I'll love you forever too, Daddy."

I smile even bigger now, and it seems like the first genuine time i've smiled in two whole years.

"I used to bring your mommy out here all the time, and I would dance with her. Now it's your turn."

I hold Hiraeth on my hip and with my free hand I take hers. I sway back and forth with her, and then move around the whole balcony. I don't need music to dance with her when the sound of her laughter is enough to make this moment perfect.

I think about how fast these past two years have gone by, even though they felt like the slowest most painful years of my life. But I need to let the moments with her like this sink in. Soon i'll be dancing with her like this at her wedding, which will sneak up on me quicker than I expect. But for now, she's still a little girl, so i'll make sure all the time I spend with her is precious.

She points at the sky. "There's the little dipper! Cissy taught me that."

"You're so smart, do you see any more?"

During half of the time she points out the constellations, i'm not looking at the sky, but looking at my whole world resting in my arms. How beautiful she is. How perfectly she was made by Savanna and I. I think Hiraeth was given to us for a reason. She was given to us to keep me alive when I felt that there was nothing left.

"There's the scorpion." She says, with her little face lit up in amusement.

"Wow, you must really know your stars."

"Yes, Daddy. But my favorite one, is the bright one up there." She points. "Cissy said you made that, so it's special."

"That's right, I made that for your Mommy because I love her so much. It's my favorite too." I say.

She smiles. "Now it's even more my favorite!"

"Hey, I never said we were done dancing." I remind her.

I take her hand again and fall more in love with her the more I hear her laugh.

________________

"I'm hungry." Hiraeth says.

I hold out my hand to her. "Okay, let's get you a snack, but then you have to go to sleep, it's way past your bed time."

She takes my hand and we walk downstairs and towards the kitchen.

We've been playing for a couple hours. She's shown me pretty much every toy she has, and has asked me lots of questions about Savanna. We lost track of time pretty easily.

I open the fridge and ask her what she wants. She says blueberries. I make her a bowl of them and hand it to her. "Do you need a drink?"

"Milk." She says.

So I get her a small cup of milk and I get myself a cup too. We sit at the dining room table together while she eats.

"So Hiraeth, do you know what I like to call you yet?" I ask.

"Nope."

"RaeBae."

She giggles. Ugh. It's so cute.

"That's funny." She says, still laughing.

She takes a piece of her hair and studies it. "I have hair like you."

"You sure do." I say. "That's my girl."

She takes a sip of her milk and when she lowers her cup, I can see her cute little milk mustache.

She climbs across the table at me, and grabs my face in her hands. But as she's doing this, i'm taking a sip from my cup. Not the best timing. I laugh, and milk flies everywhere.

Hiraeth laughs with me and we end up getting a little loud. "Shhhh." I whisper.

"Shhhh." Hiraeth does back.

I wipe up the mess with a napkin. "Why'd you do that?"

"I was trying to see if I had eyes like you too." She shrugs.

"Well you could've asked me that. You have your mother's eyes. They're the prettiest color ever."

She tries to throw a blueberry into her mouth but fails, and it rolls across the table towards me and I eat it.

I finish my milk and place my empty glass down on the table.

Hiraeth finishes up her blueberries and milk. I never knew it takes toddlers so long to eat a little snack. I suppose they just get distracted a lot, and I didn't really help with that.

"Let's get you in bed, you little stinker." I say, picking her up and carrying her up the stairs.

As soon as I enter her room, she yawns. I place her in her tiny bed and turn on the sound machine. I return to her and kiss her forehead. "Goodnight precious angel. I love you."

She closes her eyes. "I love you too, Daddy."

I turn off the light on my way out and carefully close the door.

I make my way back downstairs to the table to clean up the dishes. Once they're all clean, I head back upstairs, yawning a little myself.

I forget how upset I get when i'm alone. The whole house is asleep and quiet. And now I feel empty without Hiraeth. Unfortunately no one can stop me from getting sad when I go to sleep by myself.

I'm halfway up the stairs when I hear the front door open, and then close. I'm scared to turn around.