My Name Is Bucky [FemBucky&Sam]

The Last Word

[7 Years Ago.]

This isn't going to work, Bucky thinks.

It's nothing to do with her faith in her saviours, nor in that little faith she's managed to find in herself over the last couple of years. 2 years sounds like a long time. And it is. To most (normal) people. 70 years, however, is a lot harder to let go of. Even though she so badly wants to. She might not be the Bucky she once was, but she knows she's not the Winter Soldier, knows that was never really who she was, but was a name and an existence forced onto her.

The fire's burning her face ever so slightly, Bucky's sitting so close to it, trying to lose her thoughts in it, like she so often does. She's not alone. Nomble and Yama are stood either side of her, just a few feet behind. She can't see them with her back turned, but no doubt they're stood to perfect attention with vibranium spears in hand on standby. It's a nice little security that Bucky feels whenever one of the three of them are around her, Ayo, epsecially.

Speaking of – Ayo suddenly glides out of the darkness, her own spear in hand as the flames make her dark skin glow somehow magically. Bucky can't think of a single Wakandan person she has seen that hasn't blown her breath away, but now her breath is sucked in as her blue eyes flicker up to meet Ayo's onyx orbs.

Ayo is gentle with her, she always is - she may have a soft spot for her. She sees the look of fear, plain as day on this beautiful and yet dreaded night and gives a soft smile as she stands on the other side of the fire. "It is time, Jane." She nods and smiles a little wider when Jane nods back.

Bucky takes a deep breath – this isn't going to work, she thinks, tries not to think it, knows it will only make it harder if she thinks like that.

OK, here goes: Attempt Number 7.

Attempt Number 1? She kicked up the flames, almost burned down a nearby village.

Attempt Number 2 – They learned they're lesson with location, still not with fire, though – she grabs the scarf wrapped around her shoulder stump and lights it by flame and then proceeds to strangle Yama with it.

Attempt Number 3 – They keep her away from the fire, but they also stand between her and it and she almost manages to shove all three of them into it.

Attempt Number 4 – They learn all the lessons, study her moves from any footage Shuri can find and Bucky (and the Winter Soldier) both find out just what the Dora Milaje are really made of.

Attempt Number 5 – They kick her ass again, but Ayo tells her the day after, that it's because it's starting to work because she's fighting the words and fighting the Soldier and it's starting to make the Soldier sloppy.

Attempt Number 6 – Ayo is pleased. Bucky isn't Bucky, but she's not the Soldier, either. She's stuck in between. She is lost to her raging war of a mind and it renders both Bucky and the Soldier completely motionless.

So, now Ayo has that same pleased look on her face as she watches the broken (almost beyond repair – but not quite – not while she still has hope inside of her) woman sitting in front of her. "This will be the one." She nods and Bucky hopes it's true and also tries to when Ayo adds, "Trust yourself."

And Bucky knows that Ayo knows that's the one person she used to trust less than anybody else.

"Please –"

Ayo knows that frightful, hurtful look of self-hatred and nods firmly as she says, "I won't let you hurt anyone."

Bucky can only find the strength to nod in response before she's staring back into the flames, silently willing them to burn out the rot deep inside her. She knows it's coming, and for the first time, it doesn't really hurt, it's more of a static shock...