My Cobra Guy

Episode Forty

Daniel took them to a cheery restaurant with an abundance of plants. They spilled from troughs on the chocolate brown walls. More hung from the ceiling. Framed paintings and sketches of plants, little plaques noting their complicated names. Who the hell cared what some sissy flowers were called?

"If this place only serves vegetables, so help me," Johnny murmured.

"You think I'd bring you to a place like that?" Daniel asked, as he settled into a wooden chair with a green-cushioned seat.

Johnny sat across from him and took the menu offered by the server, a tanned blonde woman with soft curls framing dimpled cheeks.

"Welcome," she chirped, the dark green polo shirt clinging to her breasts.

Johnny didn't feel the slightest stirring in his body. Why? She was exactly his type. Good face and a pornstar body.

Maybe it was because he'd gotten off so much this morning. Yeah, that had to be it.

Johnny rubbed his chin, noting one of the first items on the menu involved granola.

"It's good to see you again, Mr. LaRusso," the server said, stepping closer to Daniel, boobs at eye level. "Can I get you the usual?"

Babes like that were into Daniel? Probably because he's got money.

"Good to see you, too, Veronica," Daniel said. "I'll have my usual, we'll split a bacon and turkey avocado wrap order. Oh, and a sparkling water for me."

Avocado. Johnny knew that was definitely something green. He could probably just eat the bacon. Maybe all the meat here came with vegetables.

"I'll take a coffee," Johnny said.

"You will try the order though, right?" Daniel asked once the waitress had left. Johnny tilted his head and watched her ass as she walked away. Nope, still nothing. His dick was not interested.

"Yeah, I'll try your green crap if you stop nagging me about it."

"Who's nagging? I think you should try new things sometimes, is all." Daniel grinned, then started chuckling.

"What's so funny?"

"I just remembered the video Regina posted. I know it's bad, we shouldn't be condoning it, but the look on Kreese's face..." Daniel propped his elbow on the table, moving his hand to his mouth, trying to hide his laughter. Johnny leaned forward, images from the video bringing his own laughter to the surface.

"The pads on the wall were a nice touch, right?" Johnny didn't bother hiding his laughter.

"And, and the, the hanging tampons!" Daniel could barely control his mirth. His entire body shook with laughter and he leaned over the table, just as Johnny had, so he could try to whisper. "Can you imagine them trying to clean it up? And the glitter? Ha, ha! I know from Sam's old art projects that glitter never goes away," Daniel snickered. "There's still some in the carpet."

"I would have paid money to be there in person and see his reaction," Johnny said, his own chest shaking as he barked out a laugh.

When his laughter subsided, he overheard a snippet of the conversation from the women behind them, perhaps in their mid-forties and savoring mimosas. "See? I want to meet someone like that, who'll laugh with me that much."

Johnny glanced over his shoulder into the green eyes of a gorgeous redhead. Even her friend had a pretty face and a slender body clad in a white flowing material. Why was life surrounding him with hot women today? Why was he still feeling nothing?

The redhead laughed nervously, and her brunette friend replied. "Sorry. We were just saying that you two are such an adorable couple. Can't help but be a little jealous."