Back to us | Alexia Putellas

Setback.

It was in the twenty-fourth minute of our Champions League game at home against Benfica when Ale went to press the ball like she had thousands of times, but this occasion a slight nudge from the defender left her off balance. To anyone else, it looked like nothing, but I could tell that she was in discomfort. She pulled up for a few moments, before slowly jogging back into her position, the grimace on her face and the slight limp in her movements telling me that something was wrong.

I tried to stay focused on the game as much as possible, but I couldn't help but be concerned about my wife. The way she was walking around the pitch, bending and extending her left knee over and over again only made things worse. When the Benfica keeper went down with an injury I quickly jogged up to her as she made her way over towards the bench.

"What's going on? Are you hurt?" I asked when I finally caught up to her, my arm hovering over her back.

"I- I don't know. My knee just feels... it feels odd" She explained as she stopped on the pitch for a moment and rubbed the side of her knee.

"Does it hurt?"

She didn't say anything initially, her fingers continuing to rub along her scar as she slowly moved the knee back and forth.

"Ale..."

"A bit, yeah" She said quietly, looking up at me with a face full of worry.

If Ale said she was in pain then it was serious, she would often play through niggling injuries, such as strains or twists that she picked up in games, but this was clearly something more.

When we arrived at the bench she immediately headed over to the physios, I wanted to be by her side, but knew that at the same time we still had a game to play, so I stood with the rest of the team as Jonatan spoke to us about a slight change in tactics, keeping Ale in my peripheral vision.

"I'm going to try and get to half-time," She told me as we walked back onto the pitch.

"Really?" I asked in surprise, I thought that the team would want to be cautious about reinjury or a setback, but it didn't seem to be the case.

"They can't feel anything too serious and they don't want to make a sub yet" Ale explained before she jogged back to her position and I headed back to mine.

She didn't look comfortable at all, her running didn't look smooth and it was clear that she wasn't playing with the flow like she normally did, everything looked forced and she looked like she was in a lot of pain even though she was desperately trying to hide it.

When the half-time whistle blew, she immediately turned to look at Jonatan, slowly making her way over to him and shaking her head. I knew what that meant...

"I'm coming off"

"You should have come off earlier, I swear to god if they've made this any worse by keeping you on then I-" I raged, furious at the decision to keep her on the pitch when she was so obviously in pain.

"Isy, please stop" She mumbled as we made our way down the tunnel, her hand reaching for mine as she stopped outside of the medical room.

"I'll come and find you after"

The second half felt like a blur, I was on the pitch and I was playing well, but all I could think about was Ale. She had gone with the physios at half-time to get more checks and hadn't come back to the bench since. That was never a good sign, if it was nothing then she definitely would have been out by now.

She eventually came back onto the pitch after the full-time whistle, she had showered and changed and was dressed in a team tracksuit as she limped towards me, the look on her face telling me that it wasn't good news.

"I'm going for a scan in the morning" 

"What have they said?"

"They can't see or feel anything, but I know my body and something isn't right" she explained.
"Can we get out of here? I just really want to go home to our boy"

"Yeah, um- let me finish up here and then we'll go"

Ale looked around, the fans were begging her to come over to the stands, our teammates were all giving her concerned looks and I could tell that she was feeling overwhelmed and getting more anxious by the second.

"You can go and wait in the car if you want to? I won't be long, I'll just quickly go around then I'll grab my stuff and come and find you"

"Yeah, ok" She nodded.

"I love you" I said softly as I reached towards her hand, delicately stroking it with the back of my fingers.

"I love you too" She whispered, before turning back and heading down the tunnel.

Ale didn't talk much on the drive home, I knew that she was still processing what had happened and would talk when she was ready, so I didn't push her, but I could tell that she was hurting, both physically with her knee and mentally at the thought of being out injured again. I drove us home for a change, but that didn't stop her hand from resting on my thigh like it did every time we were in the car together, I took one hand off the wheel and intertwined my fingers with hers giving them a gentle squeeze of reassurance, letting her know that I was here whenever she needed me.

Eli was standing in the hallway when we walked in through the front door, a worried look on her face as she looked at her daughter, desperate to know what was going on.

"Hey, how was he?" I asked as I set my bag down on the floor, trying to steer the topic of the conversation away from Ale's knee.

"Good as gold, he's asleep in his room" She said, her eyes remaining focused on Ale as she removed her jacket and trainers.

"Thanks for looking after him Mama" Ale thanked her mother, kissing her cheek as she walked past her and headed straight upstairs.

"Is she ok?" Eli asked once Ale had disappeared from earshot.

"She hasn't really talked about it, she just wanted to get home to Jordi, but she's got a scan in the morning so we should know more then"

"Is there anything I can do?"

"I don't know really..." I answered honestly.

"Are you ok?" She asked, stepping closer to me and placing her hand on my upper arms.

"I'm worried about her"

"I am too, but you know what she's like, she'll talk when she's ready"

I went straight upstairs once Eli had left, expecting to find Ale already in bed, but instead, she was sitting on the rocking chair in the nursery with Jordi fast asleep on her. Her hands holding him close as she looked down at his sleeping face.

"Did he wake up?" I whispered as I stood in the doorway watching on.

"No, I just really needed a snuggle from my boy" She mumbled, a hint of a smile spreading across her face as she leaned down and placed a delicate kiss on the top of his head.

"Why don't we bring him into our bed tonight?" I suggested.
"I think that we could all do with some snuggles"

"I'd love that" She smiled, the most genuine smile I'd seen from her all evening as she carefully got to her feet and carried Jordi into our bedroom, gently placing him in the middle of our bed and pulling the blanket over him before standing up and walking over to me.

"What if I've torn it again?" She asked vunerably.

"Hey, stop that" I said, looking into her eyes and wrapping my arms around her waist.
"We aren't worrying about that yet, ok? You've got your scan tomorrow and if it shows anything, then we can worry"

"Something's wrong"

"Ale..."

"I can't go through all of that rehab again- I just can't. Things were just getting back on track and now this..."

"Look at me. We'll get through this... I love you, Jordi loves you and we're not going anywhere, ok?"