Manhattan Dreams ✅

20. Loss

I visit with my friends for a while before my dad finally decides it's time for me to get some rest. I call into class on the way to the house with Riley sitting beside me. When we pull up to the house I wander inside and I'm taken back by how weird it feels to be home. Riley follows me to my bedroom and I'm stunned by how not me the space feels. The paint feels wrong, the posters on my wall seem so juvenile and my music collection has nothing from Josh's band. "What's wrong?" Riley asks as she watches my gaze.

"Everything" I admit with a sigh as I plop down onto my bed. "I'm gonna try to get some sleep" I add as I pull back the blankets and climb underneath them. She smiles and climbs in beside me. She seemingly falls asleep instantly but despite the fact that I've been up for almost twenty-four hours I can't seem to fall asleep. I turn the other direction and stare out my window, wondering if Josh made it back to campus alright. I pull out my phone and open our text thread.

MAYA: Hope you made it back okay.

I don't expect a response but I get one anyway.

JOSH: I didn't go back

I sit up suddenly and stare at my phone in shock.

MAYA: What?!

JOSH: I was too tired to drive

Oh.

JOSH: And I wanna see you

Before I can think better of it I send him my address and ask him to stop by in the morning. I put my phone away and let my eyes flutter shut, finally falling asleep.

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When I wake up I'm disoriented and confused. There's no Josh lying beside me and as my eyes adjust I realize I'm not in his dorm or even mine. That's when it comes rushing back. My mom. Josh and I's argument. "Riles?" I call out, remembering the brunette was sleeping beside me. She doesn't answer and I figure she must be downstairs eating breakfast. I climb out of bed and head downstairs and just as I thought I find Riley in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal. "Morning" I whisper, my voice rough from sleep and all the crying I did yesterday.

"Hi" she smiles softly. "How'd you sleep?"

"Okay" I rub my eyes. "Where's my dad?" I ask as I open the fridge and pull out a bottle of orange juice.

"Hospital" she replies as she takes another bite of her breakfast. "He said we could take the subway there when we got up. He wanted you to sleep."

"How nice of him" I mutter in annoyance as I take a sip of my juice.

"You talk to Josh?" she asks hopefully.

"Mhm" I nod as I hear a knock on the door making a smile pull at my lips. I put down my bottle and sprint to the door. I yank it open and find my boyfriend on the other side.

"Hey" he smiles making my heart flutter as I throw my arms around him. He kisses the side of my head as he squeezes my waist tighter. "I'm sorry. I was just tired and frustrated. I saw how your dad reacted to me being there and I wanted to make it easier for you" he explains as he pulls away from me and gazes down at me. "This is already hell. I don't want to make things worse with your dad."

"I need you right now" I say seriously. "You and your niece. I can't get through this without you. Please stay" I beg as I look up into his blue eyes pleadingly.

"I'm here as long as you need."

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