Manhattan Dreams ✅

53. Distance

The next morning is like a nightmare I wish I could wake up from. I'm standing outside in the parking lot dressed in a pair of sweatpants and one of Josh's shirts, wrapping my arms around myself as I try not to cry while he loads the last of his stuff into the car. I knew saying goodbye was going to be hard but now that it's actually time I'm almost positive that it's going to be impossible. "I think that's everything" he says as he closes the trunk of the car and turns his attention to me. I force a smile onto my face and nod my head.

"That's good. Make sure you call me though if you realize you forgot something...or if you just want to talk" I add and he chuckles as he wraps me up in a hug.

"Penelope you know I'm going to call you every free minute I have" he assures me, kissing the top of my head. "I'm going to miss you so much" he adds and I sigh. I wanted more than anything to climb into that car and go with him but I had finals and it was my responsibility to stay here and finish school. He was just going to be in another state, it wasn't like he was leaving me forever.

"I'll miss you too" I murmur, hugging him tighter. "Don't forget about me okay?" I ask and he laughs, clutching me tighter.

"I'm pretty sure that's impossible Penelope" he replies as we pull apart and he reaches out to wipe the tears from my eyes. "I'll call you as soon as we make it to the hotel but you better actually get some studying done tonight because you have finals to ace while I'm gone" he adds and I nod despite the fact that I know for a fact that I'm not getting any studying done tonight.

"Have fun" I insist but he shakes his head.

"I won't" he argues. "Not without you" he adds. "Last chance to throw caution to the wind and come with me" he says and I know he's only kidding but the idea sounds so inviting that I really do almost climb into the car and follow after him.

"I'll see you in a few months when you get back" I assure him and he nods in understanding.

"Absolutely. I love you Penelope" he murmurs, pulling me into his arms again and leaning down to kiss me. I kiss him back, making the kiss last a little longer than usual before I pull away and tears begin to freely flow down my cheeks.

"I love you too" I whisper and with that final declaration he climbs into his car and I'm left waving on the sidewalk while he drives off into the morning sunrise. As I stare down the empty road long after he disappears I realize there's only one person I want to talk to and it breaks my heart that I can't.

I head back inside and head towards my room instead of Josh's and find Riley wide awake, sitting on her bed with her legs crossed and coffee in her hands. "What are you doing up?" I ask confusedly and she gives me a sympathetic smile.

"I had a feeling my best friend was gonna need me today" she says and my heart swells. Every single person deserved a best friend like Riley Matthews.

I walk further into the room and collapse onto my bed, hugging my pillow to my chest and allowing a few stray tears to fall as Riley makes her way over to me and takes a seat beside me. "The next couple days are going to fly by Maya" she assures me. "And once the year is over you get to fly out to be with him again. Just think about how excited he's going to be to see you" she says and a small smile pulls at my lips thinking about it...too bad it wasn't today.

"Do you think I made a mistake not going with him?" I ask but she shakes her head.

"You had dreams before Josh. I understand that they've changed a bit to include him but finishing this year is important. Maybe next year you could talk about some compromises but it's not all about either of you and I think it's good to have a little distance. It'll just prove how strong your relationship is" she explains and I sigh, looking up at her.