Manhattan Dreams ✅

46. Emotions

Sleeping on a futon is not a good idea. My eyes flutter open and pain immediately starts radiating from my back and my neck. I groan causing Josh to stir from behind me. My eyes widen and a smile tugs at my lips as everything from last night comes back in a wave; Josh was home safe and sound...and he was currently taking up all of this damn futon.

I turn around in his embrace and reach out to rub my thumb over his cheek. "Morning gorgeous" he murmurs, tightening his grip on my waist.

"We fell asleep" I whisper, lifting my hand up to brush back his unruly brunette locks. His eyes open and a smile widens across his face.

"Whoops" he replies nonchalantly making me chuckle as he leans down to press his lips to mine. The kiss is gentle and slow, far less insistent than the kisses we shared last night and it ends all too soon when he pulls away from me and reaches forward to caress my cheek. "I missed this. I missed waking up to you."

"What? Waking up to Max just doesn't do it for you?" I giggle teasingly. He laughs, shaking his head.

"Not even a little bit" he confirms as he begins tracing small circles into the skin of my lower back. He takes a deep breath and locks his eyes on mine. "Sweetheart we gotta talk" he says softly and my heart drops into my stomach.

"O-okay" I stutter, clearing my throat. He couldn't be ending this. He wouldn't end this, not after he slept with me last night. If Josh's intentions were to break things off then he would've done it last night.

"Penelope relax" he insists, pulling me closer. "If anyone should be nervous it's me." I furrow my eyebrows at him confusedly. "Our tour starts in April" he blurts out and my eyes widen in shock. I had to have heard him wrong. That was in less than three months. My head is spinning and tears pool in my eyes.

"Y-you aren't even going to finish out the semester?" I ask, biting back tears that are threatening to fall at any moment.

"There's nothing left for MSA to teach me Penelope. I got a record deal, I've accomplished what I wanted to accomplish here. It's time for me to move on-."

"Even if that means not finishing school?" He nods, brushing away the stray tears that managed to fall without my knowledge. "How long will you be gone?" I ask softly as his hand stays on my cheek, gently caressing it.

"Until September. It's all summer sweetheart."

I inhale a shaky breath and nod. "Okay but what about after that? Will you come back to New York or-?"

"Bridget has talked to us about moving to Los Angeles" he admits and with that my heart completely shatters. Even if we could make it through the tour there was no way I could do distance forever. At some point I wanted a marriage, I wanted a family and we couldn't achieve that by living bicoastal for the rest of our lives.

"I'm not moving Josh" I reply firmly as I shrug out of his embrace and climb off the futon. I begin to walk mindlessly, picking up my clothes off his floor where they had been discarded in our haste last night.

"Penelope I'm not asking you to move there. I already told Bridget I wouldn't do it."

I look towards him and throw my hands up. "Then why mention it?" He sighs, sitting up and running his fingers through his hair.

"After the tour we get a couple months off. I'll obviously be here in New York with you eating up every single second of your spare time but we have to get back in the studio and they want us to record the next album in Los Angeles" he explains. "Bridget said it would just be easier to move there all together but New York is where my life is so I agreed to live there part-time when we're recording. The album should only take about six months and I will be home every other weekend or whenever you need me."