ᴋᴍᴛᴛᴘ | ғᴀᴄᴋ

39 ☜

i'm sorry for not updating in so long, i've been very busy lately. also, 2k???? last time i checked i had like 900 reads like damn thank you for reading this. lots of POV changes between wyatt and finn by the way, prep yourself.

Sunday, january 23rd, 2018.

-finn-

once i woke up, i was already being bombarded with questions from jack. "can we please talk about how you're doing?" he asked, i shook my head.

"finn." i looked up from my hands to jack's eyes, he looked so stiff, he had a good poker face. "what?" i asked.

"please?" i shook my head again, jack sighed and got up from my bed. "i'm gonna go home, talk to you later," jack said before exiting through my window.

i felt like crying, why do i always cry? i soon felt a wave of emptiness wash over me, i felt numb. i didn't feel like crying anymore. i slowly got up and reached for the bag under my bed. i pulled out the baggie and poured a bit onto my desktop, then i put everything back. i took my credit card to make a line, my heart began to race. stop. stop. stop.

i snored the line slowly, i began to feel everything. colors. sounds. lights. i could feel them, i forgot what this felt like, it's amazing. i blew the excess away and laid back down on my bed, i felt like i was moving in slow motion.

i stared at the ceiling for a solid ten minutes before i heard my phone ring. "hello?" i asked with a giggle.

"hey, finn." wyatt greeted me shortly.

"what're you up to? can i come over? i wanna talk about what's going on between us right now, i wanna bury any beef we have."

"nahhhhh i'm not busy, come over!!!!" i whispered, wyatt said okay, then hung up. i dropped my phone down next to me and continued to stare at my ceiling.

-wyatt-

"hi, wyatt," mrs. wolfhard greeted me when she opened the door, i smiled in response. "finn is upstairs, i was just on my way out, " she said, she moved out of the way so i could go upstairs, she shut the door behind herself as she walked out with her keys. i jogged up the stairs, when i got to finn's door, i got nervous. last time i opened this door, what i walked in on wasn't pretty.

i sucked up my nerves and opened the door, only to see exactly what i was scared of. "finn?" i called out cautiously, he sat up slowly, very slowly, to look at me. i shut the door and sat down next to him, he fell back onto the bed and stared off into space. "what's so interesting about the ceiling?" i asked, which made him giggle.

"i don't know, man," he answered, i furrowed my eyebrows and leaned into his face to look at his eyes, which were glossy. "are you drunk?" i asked, he shook his head. "nah, love, i'm on the goodies," he answered, and i knew exactly what he meant.

"i'm leaving," i said, i got up but finn grabbed my sleeve and pulled me back down next to him. "stay," he whispered in my ear, i furrowed my eyebrows and pulled away from him. "i. am. leaving," i repeated. finn frowned but was persistent to make me stay, he kept pulling me back until i smacked his arm away.

finn let out a harsh yelp and cradled his arm in his other, he looked up at me with his glossy eyes, hurt. "i'm done, finn. maybe use this as your motivation; when you stop the fucking 'goodies', we can talk again," i said before walking out, and i couldn't help but feel a bit of guilt, but i knew, deep down, that he deserved it. right as i was walking out of the front door, i heart finn screaming, "fuck!"

"fuck! fuck! fuck!" i heard slamming, i sighed and walked out, i wasn't going to be guilt tripped, not again. finn needs to understand that there are consequences to his actions, not everyone's going to baby him all of the time.

right as i got in my car, i looked up to finn's window to see him standing on a chair of some sort, tying something to the ceiling fan. i wasn't worried at first, not until he moved and i could see what it was.

-finn-

everyone will be so much happier with you gone. you were supposed to die a year ago, you should've died. right your wrong.

i dragged my desk chair under my ceiling fan, then grabbed a rope from under my bed that's supposed to be used in case there's a fire. i tied the rope around the base of the fan, then wrapped the end into a noose. i took a deep breath, for it might be my last. i shakily put the rope around my neck. is it okay to do this? should i wait until i'm sober?

c'mon. you know you want to. just kick the chair, let all of these bad feelings drip from your body.

i took another deep breath and began moving my feet around until i found something inside myself that made me get down. i removed the rope from my neck and stepped down. i heard the door slam downstairs, i quickly ran over to my bedroom door to lock it, and as soon as i did, there was frantic pounding.

"finn! open the door!" wyatt screamed. i couldn't cry, no matter how much i wanted to, no matter how much i needed to. "oh my god, oh my god. please. please. open the door." i heard wyatt begin to cry, you did this to him. selfish.

"i'm fine," i replied, and once i did, i heard wyatt sob. "finn, please, open the door," he begged. "you don't want to talk to me," i replied.

"stop, don't do that, don't say that. open the door, i-i love you," wyatt said, my heart began to race. "you've never told me you love me before," i said, lost in thought.

"i know, and i v-very much mean it. y-you mean the world to me, d-don't do this," wyatt pleaded, i sighed and unlocked the door. wyatt threw open the door and hugged me, i began to cry.

"please, don't do that. never do that to yourself," wyatt said into my shoulder, i nodded my head in agreement. "jack and i got into it this morning," i said, wyatt pulled out of the hug and looked at me curiously.

"he's worried about you, finn," he said, i rubbed my arm anxiously, still throbbing from where wyatt hit it. "i know, i just- then we got into it and i've just- ive been in a really dark place. it's so, so dark," i sighed, wyatt smiled sadly and hugged me again, i knew he was looking at the noose over my shoulder.

i felt so embarrassed. "alright, you can go, wyatt. i'm just gonna try to sleep," i yawned, "there's no way i'm leaving you here alone, i'll tuck you in." i sat down in my bed, wyatt carefully pulled the covers over me like i was a child, then kissed my forehead.

"okay, make room!" he yelled jokingly, i chuckled and moved over. i rested my head on his shoulder, i don't know what id do without wyatt.