almost three years have gone by without you on this earth to bless it with your laughter.
the saying time heals everything is a true one but just because i am healed does not mean i don't catch myself looking for you in public when i know you won't be there.
you're like a spring storm. you give me all of the signs i need to know that you're coming but i am too busy blowing wishes from flowers for you to come back to notice the clouds are above me.
the sun still shines without you here and i am okay. but then i see something and my subconscious shoves your name forward like an offering in a hostage situation and you pour yourself over me.
life is not the same without you here but it still wouldn't be the same if you were.
thank you for all of the lessons you gave me in the art of having a fiery heart who knows how to expel the flames through words and actions. I get my attitude from you.
thank you for teaching me to never stray from my self. i lost sight of this one for awhile. you always knew what you wanted and couldn't give a damn about what people thought. you were the most hardheaded person i knew.
you taught me that beauty comes from within when you died. i never got choked up on your physical features, i choked on the person you were and how you made the people around you feel.
when you died, it broke me and brought me to rockbottom before i realized you had given me everything i needed to build myself back up. I still wish you were here more than anything.
-you taught me how to live.
