you ask my why my words have grown shorter and my silences longer
but how do i tell you that often times i find the world i've created in my head
a lot better than the world i've been put in
it's not that i don't like this world, because i have a love for all the simple things
this world has to offer that we overlook and take for granted everyday
it's that i love the world more that i've created because no one takes those same things
for granted.
i don't want to fall in love with someone through small talk
i want deep conversations at midnight because the day
has held back our bursting thoughts and we want to share them with each other
i want small adventures that create lasting memories
and laughs about things only we understand
i want a world where we look at people's eyes in the sunlight
and see more than just the color there
where physical touch is still cherished and not just a norm
where you spend weeks talking and getting to know each other
on the creaky park swings
sneaking out at night but not to go make pit stops at multiple people's houses
simply for what's between their legs
i want old fashioned love
passionate love letters filled with words from the heart and the
raw emotion coursing through their body
i want flowers at doorsteps with a simply cute note
that makes girls feel more special than any new pair of shoes ever would
i want the excitement when you can only call someone when they give you
their number and you can finally talk to them outside of your rendezvous
i want a world where people spend more time outside finding beauty in
the nature around them than some nude girl on their phone screen
i want manners and kindness not trying to touch people before thanksgiving dinner
because you think that they want it and then wondering why you hear them throwing up
the same dinner 30 minutes later
i want kind women who never tear each other down and don't look at men as pigs
i want men who are gentlemen and don't look at women as a game or an object
i would rather live in the days where phones did not exist but at the same time
i wouldn't have met a person who brings the sun to the sky everyday for me
so, maybe i like that world better but who says we can't appreciate the good things
in the one we live in now?
just because this world is not my choice doesn't mean there was anything wrong with it
before we made something wrong with it
i am still happy to know that i fell in love over video chat with someone
i just made small talk with before, (it infuriated me when a conversation couldn't keep)
that the very first night we spent hours that felt like minutes talking about anything
and everything under the moon
we only noticed that our night together had turned into daytime when the birds began chirping
and we finally felt the bags under our eyes weighing us down
hearing his voice every night when otherwise i wouldn't be able to is a beautiful thing
and being able to hear my cousins voice as she tells stories of what i missed in her life
since we talked last and the excitement in the quake of her voice is enough to make
me feel just as excited for her
i am thankful for the things that i have in this world that i don't have in my world that
lets me keep in touch with her because as much as i want to be there
halfway being there is better than not being there at all
and maybe i am immersing myself in this culture but it does not mean
just because i use my phone sometimes more often than i should
that i think rappers with zero morals and an empty plate for brains
are cool just because they ramble into a mic and have face tattoos
it doesn't mean that i don't feel at home when the sun shines on my skin
and i can feel myself soaking it in and my body whispering "thank you"
it doesn't mean that i don't love the smell before and after a storm
the way the air feels when i come out of my bedroom because i can't stand
staring at the same four walls and phone screen
-am i in the wrong generation or is it just my lack of freedom depriving me of adventure?
