savage kingdom | jj project

50⇢first damage

[all the events of this chapter is happening in one day]

PAST || 5:00 AM

The door clicks open. 

Jaebum flat out ignores Jinyoung's shivering frame curled up over the doormat in the first light of the day. As if he had expected Jinyoung to be there as if he had trained himself overnight to dismiss the existence of a certain Park Jinyoung in his life. Jinyoung doesn't wake up until Jaebum is locking up and is hopping into his truck, putting the key to the ignition. 

He shoots up on his feet, a surprising burst of energy making him move fast to near the truck still standing in the driveway. The windows are rolled up so there is no way to touch Jaebum other than just banging over the glass panel.

"Jaebum-ah, Jaebum-ah please look at me. Just please, give me a chance. I will never do anything like this. I was stupid, I am stupid. If you want to hit me again, punish me, please do it. I deserve it. But don't leave me like this. Don't tell me that you don't care about me or love me. I love you, you know I love you right? I will do anything for you, just tell me. I will do anything to compensate for my mistakes. But don't leave me please."

He scratches the window, bangs at it thinking the force to be enough for shattering the glass wall parting them. He knows that he sounds obsessive like a stalker and Jaebum is the person of interest who gives zero shits about him. Jinyoung starts feeling the pain radiating from his physical injuries bit by bit. The tingling sensation shoots up from his nose to his skull. Throat dry, chest hurting for a thousand different reasons, he longs to hear Jaebum call him Jinyoungie once again, to kiss him and forgive him.

But none of that happens.

Jaebum doesn't even turn his neck or acknowledge his presence. He twists the key and drives off.

Jinyoung is left behind losing himself in a cloud of exhaust, nonplussed. He blinks at the empty road ahead, long after Jaebum has left. Everything hurts, inside out. Jinyoung tries to take one step ahead and almost falls on his face. A dizzy spell takes over so he walks slow and careful.

Park Jinyoung revises the incidents from last night right down to the morning.

Jaebum hates me.

Jaebum doesn't trust me.

Jaebum didn't forgive me.

Jaebum called me a slut.

Jaebum hit me.

Jaebum is disgusted at me.

Jaebum left me behind.

Jaebum doesn't love me.

The last one slams into Jinyoung's core. Detached from what was, what is and what could have been of their sweet relationship, Jinyoung puts one foot in front of other, figuring that he may reach home like this somehow.