Diary? Idk..

Burn

TW: descriptive throwing up
Heaving warning.. I never use tw's so if that thing makes you uncomfortable please leave now.

I knew I had been pushing too much

I knew I was playing with fire

I knew I was going to get burned

I knew all of this

I knew- so why didn't I stop?

—

I heaved and my muscles tensed. I hated the feeling of stomach acid burning my throat. Whatever I had eaten wasn't going to stay down I'd overeaten again but I'd never thrown up like this- I defiantly heaved again but I must've blanked it. it almost hurt.. my lip was bleeding again

Doing my best to not upset myself further I wiped my mouth with tissue

—

I led against the wall.. yeah maybe this wasn't a good idea

I just wanted to be a pretty girl..

Or whatever monster I am

I pushed to hard.. ate to much.. exercised in this heat.. the clothes were to tight..

Why am I doing this..?

It's sickening to the head as words scream there way into unspoken rules.

...

I looked at that bridge..

There was someone there just staring at the passing train

The wind was cooling my sweaty mess of hair

I almost spoke to them

God I hope there still alive

We're they just like me? Looking at the bridge watching and waiting for something to get better?

My lips bleeding again fuck..

I can ponder a million things

As the clocks tick

My brain races

Possibilities I can't even begin to explain in my head

Let alone with words..

Šø gö õń jüšt įgñørę thįś æñd dröŵń įt äłł ōüt ŵįth müšįć

Ŵę bøth kñōŵ

Liar..