I'm not so pathetic, am I? [Kamakoma]

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Junko had died, crushed to death with body parts flying all over. We had all watched it, all 15 of us. We decided to go our separate ways after to spread despair everywhere, it's amazing.
I heard that some feminine long ass hair guy had taken over as the leader, well sort of. I was curious and wanted to see him myself, he sound fairly interesting as I've heard he's known as the ultimate hope or everything, whatever.
I had been so lost in thought that I didn't even realize I reached my destination, I looked at the metal door and pushed it open easily, does it not lock anymore or what?
I stepped inside and saw someone sitting on a bed further away, was that truly him? He had lifted his head up, piercing his deep red eyes at me.
"Ah, you must be the new leader. Am I correct?"
I smiled viciously.
He had not replied.
"Silence treatment isn't so kind you know, there's no need for that!"
My smile grew larger and larger, I started walking towards him with my hands in my pockets. I stopped in front of him and looked down, hm.
"And who might you be."
He had finally spoken up, it had been unexpected but still nice to get a proper answer.
"I'm Servant, nice to meet you."
I held out my hand for a handshake, he stood up and gripped onto my hand, shaking it.
"My name is irrelevant to you."
I stared at him blankly, he may have an amazing analysis on people but I doubt he could understand me.
I'm Servant after all, a complete nobody despite knowing I'm a god with my luck. Nobody has ever been able to understand my reasons nor personality, not even my talent. No matter how much I explain it, everyone stares at me with disgust and confusion, that's what's fun about it.
I stepped forward and started walking towards him, I placed my palm against his chest, and pushed him down onto the bed. Climbed on top of him, and wrapping my skinny hands around his neck and pressing against his throat.
"You don't seem in any sort of aggressive mood, not even that you wish to hurt me."
He broke the silence, I just smiled at him viciously. Inputting more pressure onto his throat, his expression did not change, but he also didn't resist.
"I have no reason to be, after all... you're my new leader. But honestly, I'm not as pathetic as I may seem Izuru Kamukura."
He just kept staring at me, red eyes piercing daggers into anyone he faces, all he felt was pure boredom and nothing else.
"You're vicious, you have no desires other than spreading horrific despair so that the brightest hope can shine. Tell me, what's so great about hope and despair."
I was shocked at how well he read me, even though this situation has nothing to do with such topic, but I'll answer his question.
"Some believe despair is greater than hope, others think otherwise. Hope being the shining sun who will bring everyone to happiness and success, and despair being the black hole who'll drag everyone into their own nightmares."
I had not thought about what exactly they are, I have always believed hope was the one true thing that will rule the world.
"But when a star explodes, a black hole can be created. So, the more hope there is then more likely it'll bring the person to insanity and drag them into the depths of despair."
I kept applying pressure, he was getting on my nerves slowly. I'm usually a patient person, but this bullshit is not worth listening to at all.
"And a black hole is the end of everything, isn't it? Nagito Komaeda."

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