Chapter 106

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My chest was tight. I was somewhere but it didn't register where. I felt like whatever world I was in was crashing all around me. I saw darkness. I heard someone calling my name but I couldn't stop wherever I was going. I didn't even have shoes on when I heard the car horns beeping at me. I closed my eyes. The car was hurtling at me and I heard and smelt the rubber from them slamming on their breaks. I waited for the impact but nothing happened.


I opened my eyes and the car was inches from mine. My white knuckles were gripping the steering wheel. I was driving. What car was I in? The driver was out of their car and screaming at me but I heard nothing. It was all in slow motion as I started driving again. I let it carry me wherever it wanted. The castle was far in the distance when I finally registered how far I actually was. I looked around and saw blurred buildings. Nothing interested me. The only thing I saw over and over again were Harry and her when the door opened. It kept playing over and over and over again in my head. Then everything went black when I heard the impact.


———-


My eyes opened. Slowly. I didn't where I was. I looked up and saw white lights. Everything was white. I squeezed my eyes shut before opening them again. I only saw shapes as my vision continued to clear. Then pain. So much pain. I tried to move my head but it was too painful. I felt the IV in my hand as I went to try and get up. I pulled up the covers and my body looked...normal? I moved the hospital gown and got nauseous. My stomach and legs were all covered in bruises of all shapes and sizes. My head was throbbing. I lifted my hand to the face and instantly regretted it as I winced in pain.


"Rowan."


I looked up from where the voice was coming from.


"Marc?" I instantly started crying. I had no idea what happened. What had I done? All I remember was seeing Harry and...her. I squeezed my eyes shut again.


"You've been in an accident, sweetie. The SUV took the most beating when you hit the telephone pole."


"Was anyone else hurt??"


"No. Just the telephone pole but its all taken care of, nothing to worry about."


I continued to cry as Marc told me that no one knew where I was until I was admitted to the hospital. I closed my eyes again as the pressure from crying made my head throb worse than ever. "M-Marc, did anything else get messed up? Were you able to get everything done?"


"Dear, please don't worry about work right now."


"M-Marc, please, j-just tell me I didn't m-mess anything else u-up. I'll pay for the SUV repairs."


"Rowan, sweetie, its Thursday night. We are leaving tomorrow afternoon. The only thing we have is some editing and maybe a few more shots of the group on stage tonight. You, my dear, need to rest."


"Am I fired?"


Marc looked at me and started laughing. "No, honey, you are not fired. I am just happy no one was really hurt. Especially you. Do you need anything? The nurse will back in shortly but I have to get back to the hotel. Please, try to rest and not worry."


I nodded and gave Marc a smile the best I could through the pain. The physical pain. The mental pain. The emotional pain. I wasn't sure what hurt more right now. The next few hours I remember a nurse coming in and putting something in my IV and my eyelids got heavy. I was thankful for the dreamless sleep when my eyes flickered open. It was dark now. The only lights were from the monitors around me and the window. I looked out the window. Ireland was even pretty at night. I let the pain medication interject while the street lights danced with the other. I heard a rustling next to me and slowly turned my bruised body.


His hair was a mess of curls in front of his face. He was breathing slowly. His eyes were closed but his face was screwed up like he was in angst. The tears flooded and fell, I had to put my hand over my mouth to muffle the tears. I sat there for a minute or two not trying to be loud but it was no use. The sharp intakes of breath were too painful on my chest to be muffled. He started stirring next to me and his eyes sprung open. I turned my head away from him as I continued to cry with my hand over my mouth. From the corner of my eyes, I saw him get up and felt the lean on the hospital bed. I didn't have to turn to know he was kneeling on the floor with his head in his hands on the bed.


Neither of us said a word as we both silently cried. I tried to keep mine as quiet as I could but it was too painful. I finally pulled my hand away from my mouth and looked up at the ceiling. I kept my hand on my chest over my heart as the tears spilled from my eyes and down my neck and ears. I saw Harry look up at me. I refused to look at him as I continued to stare at the ceiling.


"P-please." He tried to pull my hand from my chest into his but I wouldn't let him.


"Don't. Harry, j-just don't." My voice was thick. It didn't sound like me as the tears never stopped. He retracted his hand.


We sat like this for hours. Both continuing to cry. One more than the other. Both in pain. One more than the other. Both completely shattered. One more than the other.


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