You Drew Stars Around my Scars - Taylor Swifts Daughter

f i f t y - f i v e

"Oh, that's great Diego" i say trying to sound excited for him

Although im not, i was hoping to hangout with him this summer

Maybe he'd even ask me to be his girlfriend

But im also no one to tell him not to go

I especially am no one to say to not follow your dreams right now

And I really am happy that he got accepted, I'm just not happy with what this means for us

"Yeah I didn't expect to get in, there only like a 5% acceptance rate"

"That's great Diego! I hope you learn a lot" I say with a weak smile "do you think we can leave, its getting kind of late"

"Of course" he smiles

The ride back home is silent and a little awkward

Neither of us has much to say

I walk into my house and close the door behind me

"Goodnight, im going to bed" I tell dad and Carla who are cuddled up on the couch watching a movie

"It's only eight" dad chuckles

"I've had a long day" I say holding back tears

"Are you okay sweetie?"

"Yeah, I just need to be alone for a minute" I nod and go upstairs to my bedroom

I get under the covers in the same clothes I had gone on our date

I'm in no mood to change

I start crying as soon as I lay down

"Sweetie, is everything okay?" Carla asks outside of my bedroom, without opening the door

"Yeah I'm fine"

"You sound like you're crying, are you sure?"

"Yeah I just need some time, will you please leave me alone? I want to be alone" I say softly trying to calm myself down

"Ok, but if you need me call me okay?"

"Thank you Carla" I say and go back to crying

Why does this have to happen?

Just when i thought things were going to work out between us

What if he finds someone else out there?

I know I spent years trying to ignore the fact that he had feelings for me

But I really don't want to lose him

🤍🤍🤍

"Hey sweetie" Carla says opening my door at around 6am

I'm awake since i couldn't sleep well just thinking about losing Diego

"I thought I'd come check up on you before I left for work, are you okay?"

"I don't want to talk about it"

"Are you sure? I think it would make you feel better"

"I'm sure, I just need to be alone"

"Well I hope whatever's troubling you, gets better, I love you okay?" She says hugging and I nod holding back tears, I don't want to cry again I already spent hours crying last night "I have to go to work but if you need to talk just text me and I'll make time to call you okay? I love you"