for you » j.b

| Ch. 21 |

Emilee's POV

Where was I? Why do I feel a body near me?
I opened my eyes to remember Justin was next to me with his hand over my waist and both of us cuddled up next to each other. Justin's eyes fluttered open as I turn to face him. He smiled and said,"Good morning."

I smiled like crazy as I kissed his soft lips.

"Good morning." I said as he nestled his head on my neck.

"I wanna stay here forever, with you in my arms. Babe, I love you."

I woke up and turned around to see that Justin wasn't near me. It was just a dream.. A great dream, but Justin did sleep in my bed last night. The only problem was, where did he go?Where was he?

I put my pillow over my head and screamed in frustration. I couldn't get that dream off of my mind and it was bugging me. I want Justin to be mine, and only mine. He has all these girls out there far more gorgeous than I will ever be and so if he liked me back that much then I don't want any one else for him but me. I sounded selfish but I think he's the one I've been waiting for. My good luck charm. I couldn't take it. I mean I understood why he wasn't asking me but this boy has got to cut it..

I got up and went downstairs to make me some coffee. Immediately as I looked on the counter I spotted a note that said...

Be back later, went to go rehearse and talk about the Grammy's, I was nominated! I'll call you later.

Love Justin

Justin, Justin, Justin.

I decided to tweet a congrats about Justin while my coffee was brewing. I turned on the tv and immediately skipped through the channels until I heard Justin's name.

Justin Bieber performing at the Grammys and going on tour soon, stay tuned for more details..

I raised and eye brow while looking at the tv and then realizing Justin was about to start his tour. Which scared me, I'm not in the best state of mind right now, but I wasn't going to have Justin postpone his tour for me.

I drank my coffee and immediately went to my room. Although I wanted to see Justin, everything was roaming my head with thoughts. I started thinking about my fears, would he come back and would I not be safe again. Would Justin leave and forget me. I don't feel safe without Justin, but at the same time I'm very independent and I can take care of myself.

"Ugh!" I screamed as I threw a small pillow at my door and just cried. I cried and cried for hours, I didn't think it was possible to cry this much. I was freaking out. How is this possible to cry this much.. Within moments I realized I was having a panic attack. I was grabbing onto my desk while sitting up on my bed just trying to calm myself down, but the more I tried to, the more I cried, the more I panicked.

I knew I had to stop because I was going to pass out. I stood up and rushed downstairs to get some water. My whole body was shaking now. I absolutely couldn't breathe. As I attempted to walk downstairs I completely lost my breathe and I blacked out as I fell.

~Hours Later~

"Wake up!!" Someone said.

"What's you do!! Wake up!! Emilee wake up!"

My eyes fluttered open to see a worried friend of mine. More than that, my lover in front of me. Justin. He looked almost as if he had a panic attack himself.

"Emilee! What happened?" He asked me as I sat up holding my head.

I didn't answer him but I just looked at him as he repeated the same thing over and over. I was trying to recall what had happened and when I did, I didn't want to tell him.

"I-I-I um tripped, I was coming downstairs to get some water." I said to him which wasn't a lie, mostly.

"Don't lie to me Emilee, what happened?" He asked me looking hurt.

I looked down knowing I shouldn't hesitate but I did anyways. I quietly said,"I had a panic attack and fell when I came downstairs to get water.."

He looked at me and I stopped him before he said anything.

"I'm fine." I said getting up while holding my head. I was going to head upstairs but his hands grasped me on my arm as he turned me around.

"What happened Em.." He said worried. "You can tell me, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, I just got frustrated with myself. You're leaving sooner than I'd want you to." I said looking him in the eye.

He focused on my while his eyes scrunched.

He tried to get some words out and then he said,"Em you know you can come with me right?"

A year slipped from my eye,"That's not the only thing Justin.. I love you, im in love with you.." And with that he did something I never thought he would do. He pressed his lips onto mine as our lips moved in sync. It was perfect, almost too perfect. I felt butterflies as his hands slid down to my waist and as he picked me up. This kiss was so passionate yet he kissed me almost as if he was hungry for it.

Our lips parted as he said,"I love you too Em, I always have." I had a huge smile on my face, but it quickly faded.

"Look, if love to go on tour with you but I'd like you to go on without me. No distractions, just do it for the fans get me? I'll stay here because. I know it's what's best for me and you. I'll come and join you for the last few months.." I said.

"Wait why not? You can't just drop a bombshell telling me you love me without me not wanting to take you." He said.

"Justin I do love you and that's why I'm doing this.. I'll go to shows at least 1-2 a month but the last 2 months I'll travel with you. I promise." I said.

"But what about us..?" He asked.

"What about it? Can we just enjoy the time that we have together because I'm.. I'm gonna miss you a lot and this isn't going to be easy.." I said as he grabbed my hand.

He thought about it for a moment and then shook his head yes, he then kissed my nose and said,"I'm never letting you go, ever."

And with that Justin was mine, not officially but he was mine and I knew I'd be safe. While he was gone.. Not completely because I still had my fears but he was mine.

Justin and I ended up cuddling while watching movies all day. I knew that I wanted to do this all day, every day.

Justin kissed my forehead and said,"I've been waiting for you to tell me that forever.. I love you.. Don't forget that." and I fell asleep.