Step-Daddy

Chapter 34

After weeks in NICU , Adeline's lungs got strong enough for us to take her home. We had to stay in a room with her with dozens of other babies. Some cried out loudly the whole time , and I was thankful that Adeline wasn't like that. She cried, but you couldn't hear it.

When she wanted something, you couldn't hear it. So Harry and I were scheduled to wake her up at night every two hours to make sure she was still breathing. It was scary, of course but we got through it together. I felt like Every time I tried to wake her up, she wouldn't open her eyes.

After a month went by, we came to find that Adeline had light green eyes. She opened them so much more and so much more wide. She was always wide awake. Time went on and she made little tiny cries. She smiled pretty much 24/7 and as much as she looked like Harry, she got my smile. She had his eye color, eye shape, mouth, long lashes,  dark hair, you name it. But Harry realized she had a smile like mine.

We took turns waking up for her, we were two of the most tired parents for a Straight month. Harry went to work only Four hours every day. Usually he worked six to seven hours daily. He was just too tired to hold his head up. He usually didn't sleep at all. We kept her in a crib by our bed. She slept on Harry's side because that's where he wanted her. He stayed awake worrying about her which ultimately made him cranky During the work day. Sometimes he would come home angry at me  I knew that he was just sleep deprived though.

He felt like he should always be with Adeline, and he still felt like he had to be 100% involved in his business. He was an outstanding father. He held her all the time she was awake. He hadn't changed a poop diaper, though. Only a pee one.

My father had seen her maybe twice. I wouldn't let Emerald see her though. That was the deal. Harry's mother was suppose to be coming to visit tomorrow, too. It kind of made me nervous and a little protective over Adeline because of what Harry's told me about her. Me and Harry agreed that if she looked or acted to be on drugs, she wouldn't be holding our daughter.

Harry hasn't seen her in forever and he was a little antsy himself. She called him up a few weeks ago and he told her that he has a daughter and she nearly died when she found out. She insisted on coming over and seeing us all. She was happy for Harry , genuinely. I could tell by her voice. I made Harry speaker phone the call.

"You know, my mother is insanely evil," Harry sighed, laying on his back flat on the bed. It was around 11:00 pm and neither of us would be asleep soon. Adeline laid propped up on pillows in between us. She wouldn't sleep there of course, she was awake and we just loved to look at her. She was gorgeous.

"Evil?" I asked.

"Yeah. Evil."

"How so?"

"When I was little, she cut all of my hair off. She shaved me completely bald."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I talked back to her."

"That's extreme."
 
"Yeah. She was abusive. But, when she left I was happy. But my dad was really no worse or better."

"Did she hit you?" I asked.

"Well she's smacked my mouth and whipped me extremely hard on my ass, hands, wrists, back. That woman got me with a belt everywhere on my body."

"I'm sorry." I frowned. I felt bad for him. His childhood seemed to be very traumatizing for him. Despite that, though he grew up to be an incredible man.

"For awhile I wanted to see other people in pain. I'm not going to lie to you, I made fun of people at school and I really used to be bad at the whole BDSM thing. I read in to it. Like, the torture stuff and I wanted to do that. My whole life I had control over nothing. Not even myself. I was homeschooled until I was 16. But that way, I could control a vulnerable woman any way I wanted to. So, I did. I feel so bad about it, hurting women. But in my defense, they agreed to. You're the only one I haven't actually done the whole thing to. You've only seen a very slim, vanilla part of it. And you won't ever see the full thing in your life. Now having a daughter, I can't stand thinking about it."

I was shocked at his words. But, I really didn't think he could help it. He wanted control over his life and he never had it so he controlled other people to do what pleased him. I didn't want to think of what his hands have done or what his eyes have seen. I wasn't interested in what had went through his mind. A past is a past.

"Well, I completely understand where you're coming from , Harry. I know your past and I'm not judging you for it and I won't put you down. What you did was... Sadistic-- but that's the point-- but you're not like that anymore. And I'm glad. Because now you have a little tiny family who is glad to have you." I smiled.

"I love you." He smiled back, a sleepy smile. The grey bags under his eyes and his pale face didn't change his handsome features.

"I love you, too. And I cannot wait to meet your mother. I know it'll be hard, but I'm with you."

"Good, I'll need every bit of you."

He would always get nothing less, if not more.