Stay Away From Me (Yoongi FF)

Chapter 3: I'm Sorry

I've never dreaded going to school as much as I have today, I lost one of my friends for some unknown reason and Suga is up to something, I can just feel it in my bones. It's okay Marissa, just go in and act like it doesn't even faze you. You came extra early so you could get a different seat, don't let this bother you. No matter how much I try to encourage myself, Tae's words kept ringing through my head 'You're a monster.' Am I really a monster? Is that how people really view me as?

I slump my shoulders as I walk into school, really not wanting to be here. I take a seat all the way in the back of the class, this way I won't get noticed too much. I'll just be the outcast that I am.

"Wow, you look like shit,” Minho mumbles as soon as she makes her way to me.

"Thanks for the words of encouragement,” I say, rolling my eyes. She didn't have to state the obvious.

"Look Marissa, you had no choice but to fight back, you could've been raped or worse killed, you did the right thing, even the police officers said it was the right thing. Tae is just having a hard time adjusting to you being strong and not needing help from any of his friends." Her words meant well, they just weren't reaching me.

I lay my head down on the desk, wanting to drift off to sleep. "I'm done with boys, I never thought I would say that, but yup I'm done with them."

"That bad?"

"He called me a monster Minho! Do you know how low my self-esteem is right now because of that! I mean I can't even go outside without thinking someone is going to be afraid of me! How am I supposed to look at myself now?! I'm even afraid of you leaving me because of me being a monster."

"You can't keep calling yourself that, Tae had no right to call you that, but why would it effect you so much?" I slowly took my head off the desk to look at a curious Minho staring right back at me.

"Because he was the first boy I've ever really liked, and he just shattered my heart." Tears are rolling down my face now. Great, I'm beginning to cry in class, this is so bad. I've never had to lose a friend for defending myself. Can I really call him my friend then? Was he ever really a friend?

"Woah, you had feelings for him?"

"Yea, but not anymore, I want him to stay far away from me. Do you know how sorry I was when I saw how frightened he was of me. Minho, he looked at me as if I was the mugger and those guys were the victims." My voice was shaky. Why is this hurting me?

"I'm sorry Marissa, if I wasn't tired that night none of this would've happened." Minho sounded so apologetic, yet this isn't her fault.

"It's done and over with, we can't change the past. I've been thinking, what if I had just let those muggers do what they wanted to?"

"Don't talk like that Marissa! You stood up for yourself, Tae is just a coward, you're the victim in all of this!" I look up at her, but then her eyes grew wide with fear. I looked in the direction she was looking in, Suga and Tae were there glaring at us.

"You want to say that again Minho?" It was Suga’s low gruff voice that rang loudly in the classroom. All eyes fall to Minho who seems to have lost her voice.

"Get lost Suga, we don't have time to deal with your crap right now,” I defend Minho, hoping he would turn his attention on me so Minho doesn't get any backlash.

“I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to Minho." I guess my plan didn't go as well as I wanted it to.

"Yea, well I was talking to you, go sit down with your freak of a friend." I clasp my hands over mouth, I never would have said that, it was only out of annoyance and irritation.