Cousin: Star light, star bright, second star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight.
Me: I don't think you can wish on a second star. That's just cheating the universe.
*
Cousin: Star light, star bright, first airplane I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight.
Me: What the heck.
*
Cousin: There. I made my wishes. And none of them will ever come true because the stars are already dead.
Me: You're wishing on their light.
Cousin: I'm wishing on their death.
Me: That's fine. We are made of dead stars. We are wishing on ourselves. The only people who can make our dreams come true are us.
Cousin: DUDE WRITE A BOOK
Me: I HAVE
YOU ARE READING
Weird Things I Heard in Life 2 | ✓
HumorThese are all completely real, completely screwed-up things I hear in my day to day life...please send help. / There is cussing toward the middle to the end, so guard your innocent eyes. [Highest Ranking #167 in Humor as of 9/7/17]
