Waking up in the morning, Joe wasn't in bed, he must've already gotten up.
I rolled over and checked the time on my phone before putting my hair up in a bun and pulling myself out of bed to go see Joe and the kids.
I suddenly remembered what happened last night, that phone call from Jack right before Joe and I fell asleep.
"Good morning sunshine," Joe smiled as I walked out of the room, interrupting my thoughts as questions swirled around in my mind again.
"Oh, good morning," I smiled as Joe gave me a small kiss and put his hands on my waist.
"Mummy!" The kids smiled, sat at the table and eating jam on toast, whilst their faces were covered in layer of jam as well.
"Good morning my little mucktubs," I joked, getting a couple pieces of kitchen roll and wiping their faces.
After they all finished eating, I helped Joe clean up while the kids went off to go play.
"Promise me you won't go looking for why he called?" Joe asked quietly.
"Joe-"
"No, Minx, you can't do this to me again. It doesn't matter why he called. This is about us more than anything."
"Okay," I nodded.
"You promise?" Joe said, holding out his pinkie finger.
"I promise," I nodded, interlocking our pinkie fingers.
"Good," Joe smiled, kissing me on the cheek and giving my bum a pinch before continuing to rinse off the dishes and putting them in the dishwasher.
I wiped down the counter tops in silence. I'm still curious and can't stop thinking about it.
Why after seven years? It doesn't make sense and I can't think of any valid explanation of as to why he would be trying to contact me. Not even necessarily a valid explanation, I can't think of any explanation at all!
"Stop thinking about it," Joe said.
"Thinking about what?" I said innocently, biting my lip and turning around so I was facing Joe.
"You know what," Joe said flatly.
"I definitely wasn't thinking about whatever you're thinking about," I smirked, jokingly grabbing Joe's d.ick through this pants.
"S.hit Minx," Joe laughed, "You're dirty."
"What?" I asked innocently.
"Oh hush, I'm going into our room," Joe laughed, motioning to the tent in his pants as he rushed into our room.
I laughed and finished wiping down the counter before following Joe into our room.
Yes, I feel bad for lying to him about what I was thinking about, but who in their right mind wouldn't be at least a little bit curious! I need answers!
"Mm, look at my hot wife!" Joe said to himself.
"Shut up!" I laughed, swatting him away as his hands ran all over me.
Joe pulled me onto the bed with him, locking our lips together and gently biting on my bottom lip. I let out a small moan as his hand hovered over me. Joe quickly removed my bottoms before crouching his head down between my thighs. I ran my hands through his hair, grinding my hips against his face as he ate me out and alternated his fingers inside me.
I closed my eyes in pleasure and an image of Jack popped in my head and I mentally slapped myself and almost jumped a bit.
"Mm, are you okay?" Joe asked, stopping and looking up at me.
"Yeah, I'm feeling great," I grinned.
I motioned for Joe to stop and he laid on his back as I pulled down his pants and I took his d.ick in my hand. I was turned so Joe couldn't see my face. I almost wanted to cry.
Why am I thinking about Jack at a time like this? I am so angry at myself, but I don't want to worry Joe.
"Minxie, stop," Joe said, moving and pulling pants back up, "What's wrong?"
"I'm sorry," I said, bursting into tears.
"Minx, what's wrong, baby?" Joe hummed, holding me.
"I don't know what's wrong with me! I can't stop thinking about Jack! Why does he need to contact me all of sudden? The curiosity is killing me, and I know I just promised you, but Joe, I need to know!"
"Minx..." Joe breathed, getting out of bed.
"I'm sorry," I said quietly.
"Then just call him, figure it out if you really need to," Joe said, tossing his phone towards me and going into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.
I really don't know what to do. Do I call him and put all these questions and thoughts to rest? Or do you I just trust Joe, ignore all of this, but always have these questions in my head?
I know what the right thing to do is, but I don't know if that's what I am going to do.
Curiosity killed the cat. In this case, the saying may become very true, I've never related to a cat more in my life.
I opened Joe's phone and typed the number from his 'Recents' into my phone before saving the number really quick and locking Joe's phone. Now I have his number if I make up my mind. I just want answers, that's all.
I heard the toilet flush and the sink start before Joe came back into the room.
"So?" Joe asked.
"I didn't call him," I shrugged.
"Minx, I don't want to play games. Please don't lie to me."
"I didn't call him! Look!" I said opening up my outgoing calls on my phone.
"Okay," Joe breathed, smiling.
Why did I just lie again?
Technically I didn't just lie, just withheld some of the truth... It's just as bad.
Joe gave me a kiss then moved to my neck, giving me kisses all over as he hovered above me.
"I love you," I said.
"I love you too," Joe smiled, "I'll always love you, baby."
Yes, I know I'm a s.hitty person.
Yes, I also know that, at this moment, I do not deserve someone like Joe. Someone so forgiving and trusting. Yet, here I am betraying that trust, leading him to think that the question of whether or not to contact Jack is already answered, when in reality it's still spinning around my head.
Joe and I had sex then. He made love to me and I tried to return the favour, but in the back of my head I couldn't stop thinking about Jack and why in the f.ucking world he would be contacting me!
I even faked it. I faked an orgasm so Joe would finish and I could just think about everything that's going on. I didn't want to tell Joe that I was no longer in the mood so I faked all of it. Joe finished in me so I instantly went in the shower afterwards and cleaned myself up.
I have an inkling Joe could tell I faked it. Maybe a gut feeling. I don't know. But all I know is now I literally feel like a horrible person. I've never faked it with Joe before. With old exes, way before Joe? Yes, almost every time. But not with Joe.
F.uck, I'm horrible.
All of this just because a phone call from Jack that could be about literally anything.
Why am I even this caught up on it? I've moved on from him, it's been seven f.ucking years. I have the love of my life willing to do absolutely anything for me and provide for our family, and I'm caught up on an affair that happened seven years ago? There's nothing about Jack that will ever come close to Joe and everything he's done for me and been through with me. God, I need to get over this already. Joe is my husband and Jack is a stupid revenge fling from seven years ago.
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