Ameortentia - Collection of One-shots

Pissing off the Old Toad (George x Lee)

Lee Jordan POV:

Umbridge had been going mad with power lately, putting up all these declarations on the wall... Like she thinks we are going to follow any of them. This is Hogwarts, shit gets fucked up the daily. Her latest little declaration is "Girls and Boys must be a minimum of eight inches apart at all times." Fred, George, and I have been looking for a way to piss her off for weeks, because she's been giving us detention everyday for a month for the stupidest little reasons. We are sitting at lunch when all of a sudden an Idea pops into my head. I look over at Fred and George who have looks of curiosity on their faces due to my sudden 'idea' face. "What are you thinking about?" Fred asks me, a smirk playing on his lips. "I'm thinking I found a loop hole in her latest deceleration."  Georges face lights up, when he realizes what I mean... Fred on the other hand looks confused. "Fred, She says GIRLS and BOYS must be at least eight inches apart... She says nothing about Girls and Girls or Boys and Boys... Get what I'm saying?"

 Freds face lights up and he says, "Yes, I get you... But I'm not kissing you. Mione would skin me alive." "I didn't ask you to. George is the Bi one isn't he?""Yes, I am the Bi one. and Yes, Im in." George says with the evilest smirk on his face. "Good. Plan goes into action at dinner tonight... I'm going to see if I can get Ginny, and Luna in on it too." Fred says, standing up and walking to the end of the table, and whispering something into his little sisters ear. Her eyes light up and she nods her head in a yes motion. Fred quickly walks back over to us and tells George and I that Ginny and Luna are in. "Good. I'll see you lot at dinner." I say getting up and shooting George a wink.

(Time Skip to Dinner.)

I stalk into the great hall, and walk right over to George, tapping on Ginny and Luna's heads on the way to the twins. When I reach George, I grab him by the back of the jumper, and pull him out of his seat. This catches the attention of all the professors at the Professors table, and several of them draw their wands ready to break up a fight. I spin George around to face me, shoot a quick wink at Ginny and Luna, and then yank Georges head towards mine, crashing my lips to his. The entire hall goes silent for a moment, and nothing is heard for about five minuets... until I hear someone clear their throat from the Professors table. "Mr. Jordan, Mr. Weasley, Miss. Weasley, Miss. Lovegood... What are you doing? Have you not read the new deceleration?" Umbridge asks with a very red face. I pull away from George and say in a loud voice, "Yes, I've read it over many times... and have concluded we are not breaking any rules... considering the face that I am not a girl and neither is George, so technically we don't have to be eight inches apart. The same goes for Ginny and Luna."

Umbridge turns a bright shade of red and quickly exits the hall. Leaving an amused looking McGonagall and a awe struck great hall behind. All at once, the entire hall (Slytherin and all) burst into applause. Ginny, Luna, George, and I all take a bow, and sit back down. As we are leaving, McGonagall walks over to us and tells Ginny, George, and I "Five points to Gryffindor each for cleverness." and to Luna she says "Fifteen points to Ravenclaw for bravery." Once George, Fred, and I get back to our dorm I turn to George and say "Well... We've gotta do that again sometime." "Piss off Umbridge?" George questions with a fake dumb look on his face. "No, This..." I say, pulling him by his jumper into a kiss. We lay back on a bed... only to be interrupted by Fred yelling, "OFF MY BED! NOPE, THAT BED IS RESERVED FOR HERMIONE AND I! USE THE BROOM CLOSET!"