Shawn Mendes Imagines - Book 1 *CRINGE*

In My Blood pt 1

"Y/n, please I need to take you home" I sob, she jumps off the couch and runs over to me.

"Shawn? What's the matter are you ok-"

"Y/n. Please. I need to be alone right now, I just, I need to be alone" I say wiping away the tears.

She presses her lips together and nods, I grab my keys and drive her home.

The ride there wasn't awkward, but I already knew y/n was worried. Should I just talk to her?

Not right now, I need to be alone, it'll be for the best.

"Bye Shawn" she says giving me a light kiss, I smile weakly before driving off.

I arrive home, take my shoes off and my shirt, everything was getting so hot.

I open the fridge and with my luck it's empty, maybe a drink? It'll make me feel better.

I go in the cabinet and find only a bottle of vodka, that'll do it.

I open the cap whiling leaning on the counter, and pour the liquid in my mouth. The burning sensation hits my throat and I clench my teeth.

Why does this world hate me? I'm never good enough, why do I always say such stupid things? Why am I such a disappointment to my family?

I take another sip.

Y/n Deserves someone better then me, she seemed so sad when I dropped her off. I'm such a bad boyfriend, why do I put her though that pain?

Another sip.

God my music, so cheesy and childish. Why do people even look up to me or like me?

I take a longer sip.

And my voice, for heaven sakes! It cracks every minute yet people still pay all that money to come see me. Why am I not good enough?

Now I'm chugging the rest of the bottle, I sadly look at it when I realize it's empty.

I stumble into my room, and once I hit my bed, I'm out.