I'm Not A Fan (BTS x reader)

Chapter 26- Jungkook's Guilt

He smiled, "she's there in your dreams?". "yes!", I squealed and hugged someone arm, "mom was wearing the white dress during the burial ceremony! She's beautiful as always!".

"so I guess you took after your mom, (y/n)-sshii?", a voice close to me said, I look up and realized that the arm I was hugging was Suga's, but I didn't let go since I was too happy. "I don't know, but daddy told me that I have mom's eyes", I grinned ear-to-ear like never before.

For them, this was sort of new but I don't really care showing my happy side, I'm just cheongmaaaaal happy!

"then your mom must've been beautiful, because your eyes are really beautiful", Jimin smiled to me. I made an eye smile, "mom would love to hear that". "so cute", I heard the boys mumbled but I shrugged it off. 

Taehyung then hugged me again, it totally took my breath away. "Tae-". "hug me back", he whispered to my ear. I tried nodding then slowly wrap my arms around his torso, resting my chin ontop of his shoulder.

"(y/n)-ah, I'm gonna leave you with the guys, okay? I wanna take my things first, stay here and don't let her leave", she ordered. They all nodded their heads. Then she left.

"(y/n)-noona, do you still remember what Jungkook said before you passed out?", he asked while still hugging me. I stared at Jungkook with a blank face, "he told me to forget about it...so I actually did forget what he said, what did you say, Maknae-ah?", I pursed my lips. He fidgetted, cute.

Jimin sighed irritatedly, "that kid confessed to you". Then it clicked....that was the reason why I passed out.

Years ago, when mom died, I passed out because of thinking too much. Then simply, Jungkook made me think too much which I end up fainting. I sighed and look up at the guilt look on Jungkook's face. Taehyung pulled away to glare at their maknae. "Jungkook, come here..", I ushered. He look too ashamed that he only took two steps to get close to me. He must've felt really guilty, poor guy.

I furrow my brows, "Jungkook-ah, closer". He got closer than before, I held his hand and pulled him into a hug, "it's not your fault, Kookie-ah, don't worry too much". "I'm sorry, noona-ah, I'm just soooooo sorry", he hugged me tighter and nearly burst to sobs but I didn't let him because when I pulled away from the hug, I kissed his nose, the way he used to do then smiled, "apology accepted....and guys, don't you dare said it was his fault, it's not his fault", I smiled reassuringly to them.

J-hope pouted, "if it's not his fault, then what's the reason?". I patted Jungkook's head and let him sat beside me, clinging on me for his dear life. I look up at J-hope, "I thought I did mention to you guys last night, that I have a weak heart? And when I encounter shock which made me think too much of nonsense I'll end up fainting on the spot". They all nodded, "yeah".

"but his confession made you think too much, right? So it's his fault, right?", J-hope argued. I made an annoyed tired face, "it's not, he doesn't know that it would lead to faint... It's actually my fault for not telling it sooner", I look down at my fiddling finger.

"I'm a bad person..aren't I?", I muttered to myself but Suga ruffled my upper hair and took the seat on the other side of me and placed his arm around my neck and he rest my head on his shoulder, "no, you're not. You're a good person and don't deny it".

I shook my head and covered my teary eyes with my hands, "y-you guys don't have to be my friends, if you don't want to... Please, don't force yourself to get closer to me, nor force yourself to understand me", this time Suga unwrapped his arms, "You guys can forget about me so that I don't have to worry anyone", but I was pulled into a hug by the guy next to me who firstly had his arm around my neck.

"noona-ah, don't say that..."-Jungkook

"we want to be your friend because we insisted"-Jimin

"well, you look like you're in need of friends rather than relationship"-Suga

"we don't mind being worried of you, that's what friends are for"-J-hope

"(y/n)-noona, please don't be like this, we're sad if you say like that again"-Taehyung

I hug Suga back so that I can wipe the tears of my face. Again, I feel bad. I let out a sigh  and pulled away after a few minutes of hugging. I smiled softly, "are you guys sure you want to be my friends?".

For a while, I saw they hesitated first, it did brought me pain a little but I shrugged it off to look at their reaction.

"dangyeonhaji (of course)", they replied together and without hesitation at all. I look at them and tilted my head, I was smirking slightly, "can I ask you guys something?". They gulped.

I stare at each of their eyes, I want to know the truth. Did they hesitate because they want to be more than friends? Or they just hesitant to be my friend?

"do you like me?", I asked, "I overheard you guys talk while I was in the bathroom...". Their eyes widened but Jimin was smirking, "so you also heard my confession, (y/n)-ah?". My cheeks were pink now that he mention it, "you could say it that way", I look away.

I could feel eyes on me as I only stared at nothing.

Taehyung held my hand, "how much did you hear?". "right after he confessed and right after Kookie said......", I blush even more.

"(y/n)-noona, so you didn't hear it until the end? ...... So ....what if we actually like you?", he continued his words. I bit my lip and shook my head, "well, it's not a good thing for me.... Your fangirls are chasing after you while I'm not, I actually got what they wished for....this just..doesn't seem right?", I smiled bitterly up to them.

"that hurts...", Taehyung muttered under his breath with a pain look on his face, he cupped my face and leaned his face closer so that he could look into my eyes, I looked anywhere beside his eyes but it was toooooo hard. What if when I look into his eyes, I'll be drawn to him? No, that's just not right.

"we don't really care", he muttered, his breath was on my face, I flinched and shut my eyes. J-hope sighed, "V, let go of her, Hyung already told you NOT to tease her", he pulled him away. After my face was uncupped, Jimin was grinning and went over to me as he lean down to my height(because I was sitting).

"so, do you still mind if I be your first kiss?", he asked the question which made me feel want to punch him in the face because he's so annoyingly adorable. I nod my head and glare at him. Jungkook slapped Jimin's arm, "kids like you shouldn't ask that question". Jimin glared at him and wrapped his arm around his neck and playfully choking him while ruffling his fist on Jungkook's head roughly, "this kid! I'm older than you!".