But I Didn't (Transgender rant story)

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This is a story based off my thoughts when my dad and me have an argument.
Dad growled from the doorway of my room. Disgusted that I would even make a big deal about this. "You know what? You're being selfish! Why don't you care about what OTHER people think for once?" He yelled.
I froze and looked up at him. My eyes wide. I tried to swallow the small bit of saliva I had in my mouth, but couldn't because my throat stung from the words I held back for so long.
I wanted to jump up and punch a wall, to scream and yell at the top of my lungs, "I'm being selfish?! I wake up every day and look into the mirror. Just at the sight of my hair growing longer and these twenty pound balls of torture on my chest makes me want to hurl my fucking guts out. I have to put on a tight ass binder just to feel okay to go outside. To make matters worse, everytime I hear my voice, I feel so upset that sometimes I have to hide in the school's bathroom and cry. I just want to be myself. I want to look into the mirror and be happy for what I see.
"People see pink and blue. In the hospital, if the doctor announces blue, you aren't allowed to be pink, but in my case, the doctor looked happily at my parents and annonced pink. As I grow older, I realize that he should've said blue. I am no pink and I've never been."
"You're wrong, Abby." He would say, "you wear make-up all the time and you dress like a girl."
I would shoot back with, "I only wear those things to make you happy! I hate make-up! I hate blouses and dress, high heels and long hair. I hate having a vagina and breasts."
I'd get fusterated and slam my head into my pillow and scream, "Why couldn't I have just be born a BOY?!"

But I didn't say it. Instead, I just lowered my head and nodded. "I'm sorry, dad. I won't talk about it again."
Dad would sigh and turn to leave.
"You're a very beautiful girl, Abby. Embrace it." And he'd leave.
The voice in my head growled.
I am a handsome Boy and my names Jeremiah.

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