Colors // Joshler

// 81. "What Color Am I?" //

For a few moments, Tyler just laid there, looking at the rain and thinking, until the sound of a door shutting broke him from his head. He listened without speaking as he heard footsteps carefully climb up the stairs, and then the door to the room slowly creaked open to reveal a worried and rain-soaked Josh.

Tyler stood up as the boy entered the room, and Josh quickly went to him. They did not kiss, but instead stood close to one another. Josh's clothes were soaking wet--he must have ran all the way there through the rain. Still, Tyler could feel his lover's warm breaths on his face, and he tilted his head up to look into his eyes.

It was then that they kissed. This kiss was slow and deep, but also warm and caring, and it made Tyler feel safe.

Only minutes later, they were laying together on Josh's bed, cuddled against one another as the storm carried on outside. Josh had changed into some dry clothes from the closet, although he was still just slightly damp. Tyler didn't mind, though--he was happy to be there, warm and safe with the person he cared about most.

"I told them I'm not going to hide anymore," Tyler whispered, a breeze blowing at the last few feathers in the birdcage of his chest. Perhaps it was still dawning on him, what he had done.

Josh nuzzled into Tyler's hair, his voice a lovely sky blue. "That was very brave of you."

A few more minutes of silence passed as Tyler and Josh just cuddled, enjoying one another's company. In that moment, neither boy would rather have been anywhere else.

"Josh, what color am I?" Tyler asked suddenly.

The other boy lifted his face from Tyler's hair slightly. "What?"

"What color am I?" Tyler opened his eyes, blinking once. He'd wondered for ages; it was hard to know his own color since while he could make a guess at it, it might be biased. "Like, how you're blue."

"Why am I blue?"

"I think it's partially because of your hair," he explained. "But I think it's also because of the way you talk, and how you write poetry, and how you can be strong but soft at the same time."

Josh's lips curved upwards in a small smile. "You're yellow, Tyler."

"Yellow?"

"Yeah." Josh rubbed his thumb over Tyler's cheek, something he was really starting to get into the habit of doing. "Not neon yellow, or honey yellow. Lemon yellow," he elaborated. "Sweet and sour."

Tyler smiled, and blinked slowly at his lover. It was a good color combination, like sunlight on water, or flowers in the sky, or Starry Night. "Blue and yellow."

"Yeah." Josh moved closer, startling Tyler slightly as he climbed on top of him and pecked his nose, eyes gleaming and a teasing but affectionate smile on his face. "You wanna make green?" (A/N: I literally put my head in my hands after writing this and reassessed my life choices for a  few minutes)

Tyler laughed, and Josh was right--his laugh was yellow, his voice was yellow, he felt yellow. He didn't know how he hadn't realized it before. "You're ridiculous."

"Maybe," Josh countered, nuzzling under Tyler's chin. "But you love me anyway."

Tyler did not confirm this by speaking. He confirmed it with his lips, and his mouth, and his tongue, and his throat, and his hands, and his heart.