FOUR QUARTERS

Chapter 72

 
 

                      Gavin
 
                  {Three days later}
 
Sitting in my parent's pool house thinking about everything the past few weeks especially the past few days. I was cut out of my thoughts when I the door to the pool house opened revealing Gwen. “Hey Gav,” she said happily. “Hey,” I said dryly. “You alright.” Shaking my head in a no motion I replied “No” “You didn’t tell Simone did you.” “What the hell was I going to say, Gwen, the NFL called and I can go to damn near any team as a starter making 35.3 million a season and that’s starting off. I’m just making way with Jonah and Simone to what leave them again.” “But you and Simone are not together. Jonah, I understand Simone is just his mom. Or is she more.”
 
“Gwen” “No Gavin is she more or not. It's not fair to neither Jonah or Simone. Don’t play with her feelings just to say I don’t want to be with you. She is a good woman and has been through enough.” “Damnit Gwen don’t you think I know this. Simone and I never dated, we went out on one date the other times we just spent together. We had sex twice and I’m not sure which time she got pregnant. All I know is now I don’t want to let my family go.”

“What are you going to do” Sitting down I looked at floor took a deep breath? “Gavin” “It’s not about me anymore. I have a son who needs me.” “And Simone” “I don’t wont to let her go.” “What’s does that mean.” “I have to go. I’ll talk to you soon.” I said kissing Gwen on the cheek then left.
 
Arriving home taken a long cold shower and my mind raced I let out a loud scream. After the shower was over I got dressed then went to prepare dinner for Simone and Jonah. As the taco’s ingredients were about done the doorbell rung. “Coming” I yelled out as I headed to the door. Opening the door Jonah and Simone were standing there. “Come in, please. Dinner is almost ready” “What did you make?” Jonah asked. “Tacos”
 
“Who cooked,” Simone asked. “I did” Jonah looked at Simone. “Momma,” he said in a tone I can't decipher. “Are you going to finish cooking?” Jonah said looking at Simone. “That’s how you going to do me,” I said laughing. You said you only made grilled cheese sandwiches.” “I am a master at them sandwiches.” I said as we all laughed. “I’ll finish yall go do something,” Simone said ushering out the kitchen.
 
Sitting down beside Jonah I just blurted out. “I don’t want to be so caught up in my own pain I miss helping you through yours. I’m only beginning to let go of what I said and did so long ago. I know my words mean nothing to you right now but I promise I will do any, every, and all I can to help you through your pain. Please listen to me when I say I am so sorry. I know I can't take back what I did or said but please know I’m so sorry.”  
 
 
  “When I was a kid I always asked momma why didn’t you want me or want us. The pain we felt was a dark cloud that hung over us. I can't imagine how my mom felt going all nine months carrying me without you, finding out I was a boy without you, going through 22 hours of agonizing labor without you.” my heart sunk lower than it already was hearing Jonah’s words. He looked at me with mixed emotions everywhere. “It hurts. When I would sneak outside I would lay on the ground be coved and protected the moon and stars I cried more tears than the sky held just wanting you. My heart would scream for you. Sometimes I thought my heart would burst screaming so hard, crying tears that would never end, but they never matched the tears that rolled down my face.” “Jonah,” I said softly he held up his hand.
 
“I know what you said, but I can also see the pain and regret imprinted on your face. I know you were told momma had an abortion so now I can't imagine the anguish you been carrying around, that guilt, the pain that embodied you. Just know it will take me some time but if you are willing to then so I am I. I know it wants to be easy we have a long road ahead of us but if we both try then who knows what will happen.” “I’m sorry. I know I can't take it back, I know I can't take your pain away, but I promise from this point forward you come first in my life.” Jonah looked at me in my eyes. “What about momma.”  
 
“What about me?” I looked up at Simone as did Jonah. “Yall ready to eat.” We stood up and walked to the kitchen. Jonah walked in and I grabbed Simone by her waist then kissed. When we pulled apart I looked at her in her eyes. “Thank you.” “For what” “Being an amazing woman and mother.” She smiled “Everything is going to be different now Simone, I’ll do whatever it takes.” Before Simone could speak Jonah interrupted us.
 
“Come on let’s eat. I’m starving” We walked in the kitchen Simone had done got plates and fixed our drinks. When dinner first started it was quite then Jonah started talking asking a question that stunned everybody.
 

“Do you yall love each other?”
 

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