BOUND TO

chapter 99 :-

I stirred in my sleep as i felt sun rays enlightened my room. I sat up on the bed and adjusted rd’s shirt which I was wearing. I kept wearing his shirts since the time of my accident. It gives me a feeling of him being closer to me.

Though every night I feel him hugging me tight in sleep, but whenever I wake up there is no trace of him… as if he didn’t even come to the room.

I don’t know why but I am loosing my hopes. I don’t even know if he remembers or not that tomorrow is our first marriage anniversary. Everyone  keeps saying may be he is planning something bigger for us. But deep down I know they all are just giving me moral support with their false hopes. They also know that nothing sort of going to happen. But still I want to try. I will try my best and do everything to make this day special.

I went down after getting ready only to see mom and dad discussing something but they changed the topic seeing me. I went to mom and kissed her cheek and wished both a good morning.

“Why did u both stopped haa… tell me the truth, what were you talking? “ I eyed them both suspiciously.

“No no nothing beta… we were just talking. Tum batao kya khaogi nashte me. Me abhi bana deti hu.”

“ no mom. I ain’t feeling like. Subhe se thoda sick feel ho raha haii… “ mom caressed my hair.

“ Sanyu beta aise nahi. Subhe khali pet nahi rehte beta. Renu use aek glass garam dudh deto badam wala.” Dad said on which I made a face.

“ Sanyu abhi isme koi natak nahi chalega ha. Tu ruk me abhi ati hu. Bina koi mu bigade pi le.” Mom nearly scolded me.

They made me drink milk forcefully. “ Mom dad I wanna tell you both something. Do u remember tomorrow is mine and rd’s first anniversary. I want to make it special. But for that I may need your help. “ I said on which mom and dad both caressed my hair and said.

“ beta we are there to help you in whatever you do in your life. We are always there. But we both just don’t want your heart to be broken. And u know the current situation right.” Dad said.

“ yes dad I know that currently we aren’t in a good terms but as far as I remember we both took several oaths at the time of our marriage and if one of us is misguided and has lost his way its other one’s responsibility to make him on the right path again. And I am ready to do it till my last breath until he does something unforgettable. “

Mom wiped her tears and kissed my forehead. “ sanyu beta me and your dad are really proud of you today. No one could do something like this what you are currently doing for rd.”

“Mom I am planning a surprise party for rd. Waise bhi wo pure din ghar me to hoga nahi to hame pura ghar decorate karne me bhi easy hoga. Aur two hours bad waise bhi sab log aa rahe hai preperation me help karne.”

After 2 hours everyone came and divided the listed work. Till evening everything was finished. Decorations,  food preparation, invitations and everything.

“ Mom ye sab to ho gaya. Lekin ab rd ko kaise bulaye ?” I asked.

“Mere pass aek idea hai, ham use achanak se call karke aese bolenge ke tera accident ho gaya haii… na na accident ho gaya to to tu hospital hogi na. Umm ha ye bolenge ke tu faint ho gai. Tab to aayega na.”

“ Shut up jatin “ everyone shouted.
“ muje lagta hai harsh apko call karna chahiye… aap ye keh dena ke apko koi bohot hi Important work discuss karna hai. Aur agar wo nahi aya to apka aur uska relation cut. “ mom told.

“Renu tumhe lagta hai aise kehne se tumhara bewkuf stubborn beta manega?”

“Harsh waise zid pe to wo aap pe hi gaya hai… “ mom taunted on which everybody laughed.

“ Ha thik hai thik hai. Me hi karta hu call. “ he called rd and put it on speaker.

Phone conversation :

“hello rd"

“ Yes dad!!!" (I don’t know when did I heard from him last time.)

“Listen to me very carefully. What I am gonna say is really important. “

“Say. I am all ears"

“you have to reach sharp at ( he asked me through signs that on which time I want rd here.. I said 11:45) 11:45 as I am having really very important thing to discuss with you. I am repeating again. I want you no matter what happens or no matter wherever you would be at that time. If you will not come this would be the last conversation we would have.” Dad said in his threatening voice.

“Ok" was his cut shot reply.

And the call was ended.
“ Do you think he would come ?” I asked.

“ Of course beta he must. Agar nahi ayega to kan pakad ke khich ke leke aunga. U don’t worry. “

Soon everyone got ready for the party. I even went to parlor to get ready. I wore his fav color saree which he gave me once.

It was 11:35 now and my heartbeats were on its peak. Lights were off, balloons were scattered all over the floor. Cake was ready. Food was ready. Close friends and family also came.
The worries were clear on my face. When parth looked at me and said “don’t worry sanyukta, aa jayega wo.”
“Ha di. Parth sahi keh raha haii.. tu tention mat le jiju aa jayenge.” Vidushi said.

Now its 11:55 still there was no sign of him. I looked at dad and he blinked his eyes in assurance.

“Harsh aek bar rd ko call to kijiae zara. “ mom said.
Dad called rd…

H : “ hello.. hello rd.. kaha haii tu… “

R : “ hellloooooooo… helloooo dad… (laughs). Me me pata nahi ka kaha huuuu (laughs)"

In the background there was so loud music that we were unable to hear him clearly.

H : “rd are you drunk? Rd bat sun meri tu kaha hai muje bata abhi lene aata hu.”

R : “ noo. No no no. I I will not tell you.  Nahi aana muje ghar.”

This was it. I wiped my tears and took phone in my hand.

“ Rd… “ there was silence from both of the sides.

“ Jaan… “ he said and more tears started flowing from my eyes. But i wiped them as I need to be strong.

“Rd agar aaj tum ghar nahi aye to mera mara mu dekhoge.” I said and cut the call.

“ Thank you all for coming.  But the party is over. You all may leave. “ I said in cold voice.

“Sanyu. “ papa said and caressed my hair.

“ nahi papa. Aaj nahi. Ye jo bhi hai aaj isse muje hi ladna hoga akele. Aap log please muje akeli chhod de"

After sometime everyone went. I was alone in the living area staring at the decorations. What I thought about this night and what’s happening. Its two am now. I was waiting  for rd and the door suddenly had a knock. I went running to the door and opened to see rd was standing drunk with the support of tyler. Once his eyes met mine I had goosebumps because of the way he was staring at me.

“Madam can I drop him in your room?” tyler aasked.
Before I could even say something rd said “ noooooo my jaan will take me. Haina jaan.” He was smiling at me.
“Tyler its ok from here I will manage. Thanks for bringing him safely to me.” I thanked him and took rd on my support. I closed and lock the door somehow. 

We just had a step ahead and rd stumbled and sat on the floor. “rd sambhalo apne aap ko “ I said and tried to make him stand. But instead he pulled me in his lap.

“ Wohi to nahi kar pa raha hu jaan. Wo hi to nahi kar pa raha. Thak chuka hu mai in sab chizo se. Nahi hota ab mujse. Muje khush rehna hai jaan. “ he said and started staring at me. I caressed his face and he closed his eyes. He put his hand on mine and smiled with the closed eyes.

“ To kyu kar rahe ho? Abhibhi wakt hai rd. Ham milkar sabkuchh pehle jese kar sakte hai. But for that I need you. Kya tum ab mujse pyaar nahi karte?” I said and he opened his eyes suddenly. A deep frown was there on his face. He pulled me deadly closer to him and said “ tum kab samjogi ki me tumse kitna pyaar karta hu?”

“Jab tum khudko mujse dur karna chhod doge.” I replied.

He was going to say something but stopped and shook his head. he was staring  at me . There was a glint of sadness  and helplessness in those eyes. Then he started caressing my cheek and lip and was going to kiss me but I stopped him. I don’t know if I want this right now or not. He opened his eyes and was confused by my behavior.
“Rd get up common we need to make u reach to the bedroom. Common try.” I got up from his lap and was trying to pull him up.

“U don’t like my touch now. Do you?” he suddenly asked and I stopped and stared at him.

“Now where did that come from?” I asked.

“I know you hate me now for all this I have been doing since the day after your accident. “

“It’s not like that rd. Common get up" I pulled him up with all the strength I had due to which I stumbled, but he held me dangerously closer to himself by holding my waist. His breathes were fanning on my lips. I eyed his lips and then his eyes. While same thing he did. He traveled his gaze from my lips to my eyes. But before he could say anything I started dragging him to our room.
After so much of the struggle we finally reach to our room. “ tum yahi ruko me tumhare kapde le kar ati hu. “ when I turned to go he held my hand and pulled me closer.

“ don’t go.” His voice was reflecting fear

“ I won’t until  you make me.” I went to bring his shirt.

“ Here, take it. Go and have shower you’ll feel better. “ I said on which he just nodded and turned to go but lost his balance. I quickly held him and balanced ourselves.

“Rd careful. Accha chalo me hi leke chalti hu. “

We reached to the shower and I made him stand supporting to the wall. He started unbuttoning his shirt but looked at me.

“ jaan. Ye khul nahi raha.” He said and I mentally face palmed.

I got closer to him and started opening his shirt button. But his burning gaze was effecting me. Though I didn’t want to look into his eyes but still couldn’t control. When I looked into his eyes, his gaze was on my lips. I subconsciously bite them in reaction and the next second I was being kissed hungrily. I can’t explain the feeling of being kissed by your love after almost six months.
But soon I realized what he did and lightly pushed him due to which he held shower handle for support and it got turned on, making us both wet.
I was totally wet by now as when I turned to go he held my hand. He was slowly getting sober. He slowly turned me and his one hand aside my hairs. His one hand went on my bare lower stomach and kissed my shoulder. He was turned on as I could feel his member poking me. He turned me around and pinned me to the glass wall and then removed his shirt. He came closer to me while looking into my eyes and pinned my both hands above my head and kissed me hungrily. This time I kissed him back with same hunger. After a minute of the passionate kiss we broke it as we both were panting. He rest his forehead on mine and said… I want you jaan. I don’t know what I was thinking but I pinned him to the glass was, my hands were in his hair, I went on my toes and kissed him.  While he smiled in the kiss and started unpinning my pallu. After he did that successfully, he started caressing my mounds. As a reaction I hugged him and his bare muscular chest came into the contact with mine. He was caressing my bare back at the same time kissed my neck. He picked me up in bridal style without losing the contact eye contact. He get us both out of the shower and put me down. He discarded all the clothes we had and get us both ready in bathrobes. He again picked me and we got out of bathroom.  He put me on the bed and went to the wardrobe to bring a towel.  The he started drying my hair while looking at me with a smiling face. He was fully sober now. That means whatever he does or will do will be in his control of senses. He turned to go may be to bring our clothes but I stopped him. He turned to me and I said love me.

I don’t know why I said what I did, may be I don’t want him to go. May be I was afraid that now he is sober he would behave like previous. Or may be I don’t want to miss the chance to be with him.

“Jaan… “

“just don’t say anything rd. Clear my doubts. I feel like you are not happy with me. I feel like I can’t keep you happy. I feel like everything is slipping out of my hands. I fell like a looser”.

“ Shushhh…. Shushhh. Just look into my eyes and listen carefully. You are not a looser. You are my jaan. You know what jaan means right. You are my soul without whom I can’t live. You are everything a man wants. You are everything I ever wanted,  wants and will be wanting. I am sorry for making you feel like this. I am sorry for everything.” Saying this he cupped my face and wiped the tears I didn’t know were flowing.

After his confession I was feeling emotional. I was feeling happy to hear him say sweet things to me, to talk to me and be with me. I don’t want this night to end. I am afraid that if  the night finishes everything would be back to square.  I came out of my thoughts as suddenly he discarded the robes we were wearing. He lightly pushed me to the bed and hovered me.

“Tonight I will make you feel the way you deserve to be treated like. You are my queen. You should feel like one. “ saying this he started nuzzling my neck with his open mouth kisses. Now his attention was on my jawline. He came to my lips and kissed me. While unknowingly my hands went to his hair pulling the. He kissing me while his hand was caressing my mound… this night was going to be long as we made love.

After the passionate love making he covered us with the silk sheet. He turned me so that my back was facing his chest. He rest his one hand on my stomach while the other one was around my neck. He pulled me deadly closer to him that even air could not be passed between us. He then put his leg over mine caging me to him. I smiled and closed my eyes taking a deep relieved breath. This feels like home.

“Good night love.” These Were the last words before I went into a peaceful sleep.