loving you is the biggest Mistake of my life(completed)√

chapter 38

Back to present//

I was feeling something heavy on my chest.I heard someone whispering or something,then i heard the most angelic voice "no nanu,i will not leave ammu,she...she will leave me.Why
..she is sleeping nanu,,for ..for soooo long.I want her up and kiss me.I dont feel good when she do not talk to me.Ammu" i open my eyes to see him and i saw a pair of beautiful blue eyes was staring at me ,lying on my chest."theo baby"

"ammmuuuu,nanu ammu woke up.Ammu why you were sleeping ,ammu al(are) you mad at me?i didnot do anything,promise.I will ...(hiccuping) be goo...d boooy"

"awww my poor liitle baba,come to your ammu" he came to me and hug my neck ,i kissed his forhead,his cheeks,his pouty lips,his white face became red because of crying.'baby who told you i am mad at you,huh?i was just sleeping.Who told you i will leave you,i cannot ever leave my sweet liitle,chubby,cuty,good theo,ammu loves you so much.When you love a person you can never leave him,ok baba?"

'i love you too ammu' he then kiss me the way i kiss him."all right enough of mother son love, shehzad let me see your ammu,its our time" "no nanu,you are je..je..tous..of me.I will not let go ammu" then he let his tongue out to tease abbu" baba,its jealous,not jeatous,who teach you this words,anyway baba you go play with abaraham,i have to talk with your nanu and everyone.Now play" "Ok ammu,bye"

abbu sat beside my head with  concern and defeated eyes"i am sorry baccha,i shouldnt have remind you about that beast,your ammu is still angry with me.Because of me everyone's mood got ruined allah ta alar rohmot that rehan was there otherwise i dont know what would have happened." "abbu she is absolutely fine now,it sometimes happen because of stress,now lets go let her sleep,she needa rest."He blink his eyes at me,i understood what does that mean.

Rehan is fariha's husband and our family doctor.He is jamal uncle's son who used to study with fariha.Though it was an arranged marriage,he always make sure to give her all the happiness that she deserve ,not only fariha,he took care of our family,of me,of theo like his own one.He became the backbone of our family,not the son in law but the responsible elder son who knows my another secret which even my family dont know about.I am scared when they will get to know how will they react,rehan always tell me to talk to them.But i am not ready,he is trying his best to solve my problems but its all in our almighty's hand.I am still fighting but i dont know for how long i would be able to hide this secret.

In this last 3 years i have seen a lot,face a lot,tolerate a lot.That person was not enough to ruin me,so our society took the responsibility to break me more.When i arrived in Bangladesh my family couldnt believe at first,they were alll quite after seeing my conditions and my pregnency news.My ammu cried every night whenever i had nightmares,i used to scream at night and each member of my family came into my room to handle me.Because of condition ammu send my little brother to my uncle's house.Our cheerful life became silent and it happened because of me and my wrong decision.

In every conservative country people always concern about what is happening in the next door.They like to gossip,they were always eager to know who's life had ruined,who's having affair,who got cheated,who got pregnant,who elope,who has more money.So when they got to know about my pregnency they became curious who might be the father is.Whenever ammu or me or other family members used to go outside neighbouring aunties used to pretend how they are sorry about my condition,they were pitying me,some were whispering like'dont judge by its cover' .So they tagged me as a'single mother' 'characterless girl' 'who knows how many foreigners were her lover' some mothers told their daughters strictly not to make any conversations with me.I will not say all people are same,the people who used to know the real me like my friends,relatives, not all but still some of them helps us a lot.

My nightmare effect me a lot,also i used to be in depression,which makes me nearly lose my baby,but he is really a fighter,he was born like any other healthy baby.But because of some complication doctors said i may not be get pregnant again.The news broke me but i was grateful to allah that my theo was fit and fine.When abbu first saw him he couldnt believe his eyes.He immediately gave him to my mother and went out from the room.At first i didnt understand why he was behaving like this but when i saw my baba even i was shocked,because was a replica of his own father.Same blue eyes,same features.It was like fate was playing with me.I understand abbu's feeling.His first grandson was the same replica was that beast.It took a long time to accept my baby,he knew if he do not accept,then he will definitely lose me and he knew that i am not just only his daughter but also a mother.So my baby became my first priority.

3 years ago abbu took adam's help to find a good lawyer so that he can file for a restriction order.No one knows that adam help us even though he was his friend.He told us that Dad i mean mr manhattan cut his all ties with his son.He gave all the property but he declared to cut all types of relationship with him.Mr manhattan tried to contact us,try to beg for our forgiveness but abbu break his friendship and vow to never see his face.Abbu even told him that he shouldnt have saved his family .His own kindness ruined his own daughter's life.After we came in bangladesh we cut ties with every people in london whom we used to knew.Even adam,martha and nia.No one knows in london about my baby except adam but he promised me not to tell anyone.

Though i call my chubby baby theo,but his full name is shehzad rahman.Only me call him theo,i once promised my then father in law that if he have any grandson i will name him theo because it was his brother's name who died at young age who was so much close to him.I dont know why i couldnt forgot that promise. Nobody knew about the secret of this name.My baby is sweet,friendly,loved by everyone just the way i wanted him to become.

Now we are in canada,the reason is theo ,he need a new environment beacuse in our country people have started to question theo's identity,if he spent his life there then people would have made his life hell forever . we are living with fariha and rehan and their little 1.5 years old boy abraham.At first my two sisters lose all hope and trust in love but iqram did everything so that fariha fell in love with him.After 1 year of trying he finally make her to fell in love with him and make a sweet liitle boy.But suhana who used to be so cheerful and dreamy about romantic things she became quite serious,she thinks that love is nothing but a word to trap someone and ruin that person's lifeIt all happened because of me and i cant do anything to change it.

Right now i am working in a flower shop,you may be thinking what happen to your mba degree and all that.All the things happened to me in the past made me isolated from everything.I lose my all confidence,i feel sacred when i stay in a crowd place,plus my health doesnt allow me to do 9 to 5 work.So i choose this place ,it is peaceful,all the customer who comes here is very friendly and the flower shop was near to our new house.The owners of this flower shop are very sweet and friendly.They treat me like their daughter.I still remember our first encounter.....

Flashback//

I knew i cant stay still at the house,have to do something which will give me peace.I dont know any place in here so iqram suggest me to roam around in the neighbourhood.They are very much friendly and i will find some park where theo can play with other kids.I was roaming around with theo,he was so happy, no one was straing him with curious eyes,he was happy ,many kids accepted him .

Then i saw a flower shop ,a man and a woman own this flower shop.The name of the flower shop was "rosa" .So i went towards the shop i saw variety of flowers,then i realize how i used to love flowers,they are my favourite,it gives me peace.Suddenly someone tap me on my shoulder,i saw a man in his early 50,with a humble smile was standing before me."Hi dear,i am john,how can i help you ?" "hello i am new here. my son is playing over there,i love flowers so i thought i should check it out,you have some beautiful flowers." "thanks ,actually all the flowers picked by my girlfriend rose". Then an idea clicked my mind "Actually are you hiring anyone, would love to work in here,if you dont mind" "actually we are hiring,our last worker got married so we need new one and guess what you are hired" "thank you so much,by the way i am farha""wait let me call my girlfriend,she is the co owner of the shop" "ok sure,i would like to" "rose, dear can you come here for a second?"Then i saw a beautiful woman came from inside ,she was i think in her late 40.She was very gorgeous fine woman.She smiled at the man and kissed his cheeks."what happened john?" "dear i would like to meet our new neighbour farha and our new worker" "omygod nice to meet you and welcome to rosa,oh i forgot to introduce myself,i am rose,emily rose.

guys i couldnt concentrate on my studies ,i dont know whyyyyy😭😭😭😭😭tomorrow is my exam and here i am writing a new chapter.I dont know why i am not feeling to study anything.Anyway,here is your new chapter,follow,vote and share my book.Bye😥