Marvel x Male Reader (1/2)

Random Nonsense #2

This is weird, I know, but I've had this idea for about a week and I don't want to ignore inspiration. Also, I guess I didn't really take a break; my author's notes are useless.

You were sucking on a potato chip.

Tony: I've got something better for you to suck on.

You: A lollipop?

Tony: You know what I'm talking about.

You: Well, it probably looks like one.

Peter: Weirdest. Roast. Ever... why are you sucking on a potato chip?

You: It extracts the salty taste.

Tony: I've got something with a salty taste.

You: Make like your pre-cum and piss off.

Peter: I am loving this conversation.

You: Oh shit, there's a hole in the... the bag is torn.

Tony: I've got a better hole for you to curse about.

You: I will burn you to death.

Wade: Are we back to the element powers now?

You: No, I've got a burning spell.

Steve:  What is going on?

You: Tony's being a dick. Does that qualify as a pun?

Peter: Yeah...PUNishement.

You: And that was better?

Wade: How are we gonna end this?

You: By watching the Lego Movie 2.

Peter: That? Ugh.

You: ...Eat my ass.

Tony: Gladly.

You: AAAAHHHHH...