Marvel x Male Reader (1/2)

The Flirtatious Fuckboy- Wade

You: Hiii, Wilson. Soooo...

Wade: Don't you dare, you flirtatious fuckboy.

You: Pardon?

Wade: You do realise there are consequences for sleeping with HALF the team?! Right?

You: I uhh...

Wade: Also, how dare you mess with the innocent minds of Stevie-boy and Petey-pie? Are you out of your mind?! Let me answer that for you, if I'M the sane one in this conversation, then YES!

You: Since when are flings illegal?

Wade: Tell me, wise old Y/N, when Peter talks about how he met a cute guy to Clint, Clint's gonna tell Nat, who THEN will tell Steve, and Steve will also mention meeting a cute guy. Thor, who will want to insert himself into the conversation, will say he also met a cute guy. Tony would probably absent-mindedly say he had a fling with a cute guy last night. How long until they find out you're nothing but a piece of shit?

You: Goddamnit.

And lo and behold, here come 3 angry Avengers. you'd think Tony would at least be a bit mad that Y/N slept with other people but I digress.

Wade: You know, sometimes I think the world would be a better place if you just magically disappeared!

Y/N: *magically disappears*

Wade: Did I just go from breaking walls to disintegrating people? I know I didn't but it's a nice joke to make. Besides, Y/N, or at least this Y/N *wink*, is not a person.

247 Words.

Hi, I'm back from my hibernation. I'm 14 now! (well I turned 14 2 days ago. April 10th if anyone's curious) Woohoo. You'd think quarantine would make me update more...or better. Anyway, ciao. See you in a month or 2!