Son of Stark ( Peter Parker × Male Reader)

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"Warning": This is platonic. No lovey-dovey. The only gay thing here is Stony.

You: Hey.

Tony: Hi.

Steve: Hello.

You: Uhuh. So is it a boy or a girl?

Steve: What?

You: I know you guys are adopting. So, 1? 2? 3?! Teen? Toddler?

Tony: How in the hell did you-

You: It's funny how no one remembers my powers. So, I assume you gonna surprise the team. Can I come with? I wanna give input.

Tony: Fine.

Steve: No. This is something we want to do privately.

You: EEEEH! I'm so excited!

Natasha: Why are you excited?

You: Uhhh...I'm going on a date.

Clint: Y/N's getting laid? High five.

You: No, ew, you're disgusting.

Nat: Mhhhmmm, good luck then.

You: Ok, so I'm going to the park, I have a date with a stray cat. Ooh, can I adopt a cat? You have the right to a child, I want a dog, i changed my mind in the 2 seconds I was talking I want a dog now.

Tony: Ok?

You: Yay! This is gonna be great. Besides, it'll distract the team from the real surprise. If you show up with a kid, no one will suspect a dog!

Steve: Are you being serious right now?

You: No, I'm joking duh, I'll distract them with the kid AND a cat- ok seriously though I will distract them with the pet. Wait, big or small dog?

Tony: I personally don't care.

You: I'm gonna go on patrol first.

Time Skip brought to you by me, you geniuses:

As you sit on a rooftop, patiently waiting for a sound that indicates any form of crime, spidey joins you.

(You do not know of his identity)

Peter: Hey.

You: Hi.

Peter: So, I was thinking. We're both friends, right?

You: Yup.

Peter: And we're both trustworthy superheroes.

You: You can say that.

Peter: So what if we revealed each other's identities.

You: Oh, ok.

Peter: Ok. On the count of three. 1.

You: 2.

Peter: Tres.

And you both slowly take your masks off.

You: Jesus! You look much younger than I thought!

Peter: My name is Peter Parker. I'm 15.

You: That explains it. Well, I'm Y/N L/N. 23 (Idk).

Peter: By the way, it's so cool having an Avenger as a friend.

You: Thank you. To be honest, I find it weird how they think I'm the weakest link yet I contain the power of knowledge. It's a bit inconsistent but it's cool. I can also fly, conjure spells. Doctor Strange is the only one who beats me on that level. Not even Thor's lightning matches me. It's honestly annoying. Does anyone in your life know you're Spider-man?

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