Ella Karev

Chapter 3

ELLA'S POV

"Dr. Karev, can you entertain me please," I heard Jonathon's voice. I walked into his room which was down the hall from Brooklyn's. The nurse knew to page me if she woke up.

"What's up Jonathon?" I asked.

"My dad isn't here, he's always here with me at night," he cried.

"Hey, it's going to be okay, what can I help you with?" I asked.

"I just want to go home. I hate being here," he said. I gave him a questioning look and helped him into a wheelchair.

"Let's go for a stroll," I said, leaving a note letting the nurse know. I wheeled him down past Brooklyn's room, seeing that she was still fast asleep. I wheeled him around a few laps and let him watch me try to wheel on my shoes as he was able to laugh. I got him back to his room, and I could tell he was sleepier. "Ready to try to get some sleep? I'll put a good movie on for background noise?" I said, helping him to bed.

"Yeah, sleep sounds great right now," he said. I smiled, putting on my favorite Cars.

"Alright, get some sleep, we'll be back in the morning," I said. He nodded, and I walked back to Brooklyn's room, seeing that she was stirring. I walked in, closing the doors behind me, and I sat down beside her.

"Wh-where's my mom-mommy?" She cried.

"Brooklyn, you're okay. I'm right here for you," I said.

"I want my mommy," she cried.

"I know. I'm sorry, they're at home sleeping so when you see them in the morning, you can feel all better," I said. She nodded, as a nurse walked in, giving her, her next dose of pain medication. "How's the pain on a scale from 1-10?" I asked.

"Um, a 5," she said.

"That's great to hear," I said, seeing a smile appear on her face.

Hours went by, and I fell asleep holding Brooklyn's hand. Her vitals were staying strong, and the infection seemed to be gone. I assumed that's why she was also sleeping much longer, compared to earlier. Arizona popped in at one point and snapped a photo, and showed my dad and Jo, they were all proud of me and the connections I was able to make with my patients.

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This week flew by on peds, and I knew I couldn't wear the wheely shoes when I was on Meredith's service. I knew I was set on peds, but I couldn't put my request in until I was on everyone's service. I put the wheely shoes in my locker, and locked it shut, heading to Meredith before rounds started. I saw Arizona in the hall, waved, and blushed, as I turned down another hallway. The bar had gotten chaotic when I was there Friday night. I remember our lips touching, and I don't remember anything else after that. I was drunk, and so was she. I didn't think it meant anything. I didn't know how to talk to her.

"Ella, snap out of it," Meredith said, walking into a patient's room. "Present," she said.

"This is Elmer, age 67, he's here for his appendix, surgery is at 12 pm, and he should be able to go home tonight if all goes well," I said. She nodded and looked over at him and his wife.

"Ready to get prepped for surgery?" Elmer nodded, and I handed the chart to Meredith as I wheeled Elmer to the OR. I needed to get my mind off Arizona because I couldn't focus on Elmer. I didn't want to mess up, and I knew going to the bar with Aria and Tyler tonight would hopefully take my mind off her.

"Meredith, would you like me to scrub in?" I asked.

"Well, where else would you be? Scrub in please," she said. I scrubbed, and headed into the OR, got gloved up, and watched her cut him open. "See here, it's easy to be mistaken for what to actually detach. Do you want to make the cut?" She asked. I nodded and cut right where she told me to, and I watched her remove the appendix. She closed, and I brought him into recovery as she scrubbed out and was waiting for me by the nurse's station. "Did Arizona teach you how to talk to the patient's family?"

"I mean I was with her when she talked to the families, but I haven't on my own yet," I said.

"Let's have you talk to Elmer's wife, everything went well, so you can tell her all good news," she said. I nodded, taking a breath, and I walked to the waiting room as she stood by the doors. I saw his wife sitting down, with her head down, looked like she was snoozing.

"Ms. Anderson.... Ms. Anderson," I said, sitting down by her. I got confused as she didn't answer, me. I put my hand on her shoulder, and her head fell into my hands, and I looked towards Meredith, terrified. I could feel my lunch churning like butter. I felt my breathing stop and watched as Meredith ran over, and yelling at the nurses.

"Can we get a gurney?" She yelled, running towards me. I held onto her head, and Meredith took over, and I backed up as nurses ran over, and they got her on a stretcher, and I looked around me, as I felt everyone's eyes on me, and I turned and ran towards the locker room. "Ella," Meredith yelled after me. I knew I disappointed her, but I couldn't take everyone staring at me. I made it to the locker room, and I slid down my locker, bringing my knees to my chest, sobbing into my hands. I wiped my tears, staring ahead of me. I heard the door, looking up to see Arizona standing there.

"Ella, are you okay?" She asked. I wiped my eyes, looking up, avoiding eye contact, and she sat down next to me, putting her hand on my arm. "Talk to me," she said.

"I went to talk to a patient's wife about the surgery, and she was dead, her head fell into my hands..." I cried. Arizona wrapped her arm around my shoulder, leaning her head to mine.

"You did nothing wrong," she said.

"I ran off like a baby," I cried. "It was embarrassing, I couldn't take everyone starring me down," I said. Arizona lifted my chin up, as I made eye contact with her.

"It's okay, that's a scary situation," she said. I took a deep breath, and she wiped my tears away, as I put my hand on her cheek, pulling her in for a kiss. She pulled apart right away, and I felt stupid. Why did I just kiss my attending? "Ella...."

"I'm so sorry, that was so wro..." She cut me off as she crashed our lips together again, and I could smell the faint vanilla on her, and just felt myself melting into her arms. I pulled apart, resting my head to hers.