Issue #13: Cool Confusion

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"Ghost! Ghost, wake up!" I heard someone say at someone slapped my face.

"Wha? Who's dying? Which guard are you?" I asked as I began to stir and wake up. I rubbed my eyes and saw Rick looking down at me.

"Fine time for you to get busy and then take a nap, soldier. Where the fuck is half the team?" He asked.

"Ugh, hold on I've gotta try to remember half of their names first off... also you're one to talk about taking a nap Mr. Unconscious-For-" I looked at the clock next to me. "Seven hours!? I barely got any sleep!"

"I was unconscious for seven hours?"

"Ugggggh what is everyone shouting about!?" Komi asked as she woke up. She saw Rick and rolled her eyes. "Great, you're still alive."

"For fucks sake can you all just shut the fuck- woah, I see dead people." Terra walked in the room with a bathrobe on over her presumably naked body.

"Where did you get that?" I asked.

"They just had it laying around in the other room."

"But the bathroom is in this room. Why would they keep it in-"

"Can we all fucking focus?" Rick interrupted Komi and she gave Flag a dirty look. "Casper, bring me up to speed."

"Well you were there when KGBeast fucked us over and ate shit, Turtle stepped on a landmine and blew up into bits, Ten Eyed Man kicked snow into his eyes then kicked the bucket after a watchtower fell on him, Killer Moth got his head sniped off, and that idiot Blackguard ran on an ice lake during our escape and fell through."

"Really? That's what we're going with for that?" Terra asked.

"Yes because that's what happened." I said through gritted teeth.

"Alright, what's the plans on the mission from Waller now?" Rick asked.

"Yeah, about that, we've got no connection to Waller. It's complete static." I said.


"(Y,N) thinks they jammed it once they learned we were from your US Government." Komi explained.

"(Y,N)? That's your name?" Terra asked.

"What wrong with that?"

"Nothing I just thought it wouldn't be (Y,N). Something like-"

"Guys, focus!" Rick was probably getting annoyed. "So how'd we end up in some cottage in the middle of who knows where?"

"Russia, dumbass." Terra interjected.

"That was really more of a deus ex machina. We walked for a bit to get away from the base, were cold and tired, and happened to find this cabin uninhabited to rest up in while thinking of a new game plan in the morning which I guess is now, much to my chagrin." I lied.

"That's what were going with for that!?" Terra asked.

"Because that's what happened, sweetie. You were there." Komi backed me up while putting a hand on my shoulder and leaning in like she was literally supporting me.

"...Oh my god, you guys totally banged." Terra said with a disgusted look on her face.

"No, we didn't." I said getting up from the covers and standing up.

"Well don't sound so disgusted at the thought!" Komi said with an insulted tone.

"You know I'm anything but disgusted by you." I said pointing at her.

"Yeah we can tell. So *ahem* why don't you put away Private Johnson there?" Rick said. I gave a confused look to him who was looking away and Terra who whistled while looking down at my- oh god dammit. I put my dick back in my boxers before walking into the bathroom to put my pants back on.

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