A year as a Narnian || 365 Narnia one shots (Part two)

266: failure

September 23rd - prompt: Courageous

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"Ed?"

Edmund's head snapped up and he took a deep breath, slowly standing and turning to face his brother, who'd walked into the room with a small frown on his face. "Yeah?" He asked quietly.

Peter stared at him for a moment, still frowning, before walking over to grab his cloak which hung on the back of his desk chair. "Me and Lucy were gonna go for a walk, fancy joining us?" He asked, flinging it over his shoulders as he spoke.

Edmund bit his lip. "I'm okay." He murmured, sitting back down on the edge of his bed with a sigh. 

Peter's frown got deeper. "Is something wrong?" He asked. 

Edmund shook his head quickly. "No." He mumbled. "I'm just tired." 

Peter stared at him, before walking over and, to Edmund's surprise, kneeling on the floor in front of him. 

Edmund frowned, and tried to keep the worried look on his face at bay, but something told him that he was failing miserably. 

Peter was silent for a long while, before he took a deep breath. "Talk to me." He said slowly, voice neither firm nor soft. 

Edmund hesitated. 

"I'm not stupid." Peter pointed out, still not moving from his position. "I know when something's wrong, and something's wrong right now, so talk to me." 

Edmund sighed. "Why do you never leave me alone?" He grumbled. 

Peter gave him a soft smirk. "I'm your older brother." He said. "I'm not allowed to leave you alone when you're looking like this." 

Edmund smiled weakly, but it was gone as soon as it came as he sighed again. "I just feel like such a failure." He whispered, trusting his brother enough to know he could indeed talk to him. 

This seemed to make Peter beyond confused, and he frowned deeply. "What on earth makes you think that?" He asked. 

Edmund bit his lip. "It's just, during Beruna, I - I felt like, I - I failed." He whispered. 

Peter was shocked. "Ed," He breathed. "You broke the witches most powerful weapon." 

Edmund swallowed hard. "But she defeated me." He whispered. 

Peter sighed. "We haven't really talked about this, have we?" He mumbled as he moved to sit beside his brother on the bed. 

Edmund slowly shook his head. "You've more concentrated on the side where I nearly - nearly lost my life." He murmured. 

Peter took a deep breath at just the mention of that, before he pulled himself together. "What you did that day was the most brave, most courageous thing anyone has ever done." He said firmly, turning his upper body to face his brother. "No one else even thought to do what you did Ed, you saved so many lives, including mine." 

Edmund sighed. "But she defeated me." He choked. "Again..."

Peter shook his head. "She defeated me too." He reminded him. "But her defeating you doesn't mean anything. She was a good swordswoman Ed, she had had a lot more practice than you had. Besides, you were injured, so I think it says something that you were able to best the White Witch whilst injured, even if it was just for a second."

Edmund sighed. "I just - I dunno." He muttered. "I can never stop thinking about what she did after I destroyed the wand..."

"I know, trust me Ed," Peter breathed. "As someone who watched it all happen, I know. But through the horror and terror I felt when I saw you with the witch, and after you woke up, do you know what I felt?"

Edmund slowly shook his head. 

"Pride." Peter said firmly. "I was beyond proud of you, I don't think I'd ever been prouder. I was so proud of my little brother for facing his worst fears, whilst hurt, to save so many people." 

Edmund stared at him for a moment, and after seeing the sincere look in his bright blue eyes he slowly smiled, only a small smile, but a smile nonetheless. "That means a lot." He whispered. 

Peter smiled at him. "You are the bravest person I know Ed." He said. "So what if you didn't defeat her, you were still brave enough to face her, and destroy her most treasured possession, and that took true courage, okay?" 

Edmund nodded slowly. "Thanks." He whispered. 

Peter nodded back. "I mean every word." He replied. "Now, we can either stay here, and I'll make us something to eat and something to drink, or me, you and Lucy, and hopefully Susan, can all go out for a walk together, clear your mind a little." 

Edmund hesitated, before taking a deep breath. "I'll come for a walk." He breathed. 

"Okay." Peter whispered with a soft smile. "Never forget what I've told you Ed, ever." 

Edmund gave Peter a gentle smile, nodding slowly. "I won't." He murmured. "I promise."

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