I tossed and turned all night. I found myself crying silently with my eyes closed. I wasn't comfortable at all. I wiped my tears and sat up. I took some of the couch cushions off the couch and the time caught my eye. It was going on 3am. All I could do was think about my kids. Did they eat dinner? Did they go to school? Did he help with homework and did he check over it. Does Azaria have her extra blanket? Did Amaris brush his teeth? Did he take Austin's phone from him and make him go to bed?
I tried not to cry again but it was so hard being so emotionally drained. I've cried enough tears for a life time at this point. I had to put up 75,000 tomorrow on my school to get finished and even than it won't be finished until next school year. All the damages to my house was equaling up to 5.9 million dollars. Whoever was doing all this to me sure as hell did they big one!
I got up and went to the kitchen maybe some tea would help me a bit. I haven't seen my babies in almost 4 days. It was breaking me.
I could see lights coming up the driveway. I thought it would be Kay'Sean coming home. But my phone started ringing. I went to go answer it and it was from an unknown number.
Hello? I questioned.
Come outside! A deep raspy tired voice said on the other line.
I looked at the phone for a bit than hung up. I slipped my house shoes on and tied my robe. I opened the door and closed it behind me. Monster sat leaning on the hood of his car.
I walked towards him slowly. It was silent as we looked at each other. Neither one of us was saying anything. I was about to turn and walk away when he spoke. "I contemplated on coming here...."(He stood up and walked to me. We was face to face.)
Than why did you?
Because I love you and no matter how hard or how much I wanna hate you I can't. I always made the vow to you to protect you and I always keep my word!
Than why are you treating me like this? We've been through a lot but this...this... Monster this feels different I wasn't just attacked my kids was and so much is happening I'm losing everything! I started to cry.
Come here! He pulled me into him and wrapped his arms around me. "Queen I ain't gone let anything happen to you. I got this!"
Do you? Do you really Monster cause shit been hitting than fan back to back.
I always take care of shit don't I?
Yeah...
Okay than! Look the kids miss you and I know you don't wanna sleep on the couch anymore. Come to the couch and you can sleep in my bed. I'll sleep in the guest room.
You don't...
Queen I ain't gone fight you on this, get in the car. He opened the car door for me and I got in. He got in on his side and pulled off. The car ride was quiet to his house. Ginuwine Love You More played on the radio as he drove. I haven't heard this since that night he kissed me. This was one of our wedding songs.
He pulled up to his house and he was so exhausted. We got out the car and he opened the door. I've never been in the inside of his house. It was beautiful! I hated the fact I was inside a home he shared with another woman. He dropped his keys in the bowl by the door and locked the door.
My room is upstairs down the hall and on the right. He said as he began to walk down the hall.
Ja'Kari? I called out looking at him. He turned back around and looked at me. "Thank you!" He nodded his head and jet walking. I walked up the stairs following the light snores. I knew it could only be Amaris. I found each child room and kissed them goodnight. This made me feel better.
I made my way back downstairs and down the hall Monster disappeared down. I found the room he went into and I could hear the shower water running. I undressed to nothing and opened the shower doors. He was letting the hot water run all over him. He turned around to face me and his eyes was red like he was crying.
I don't wanna sleep in a bed you slept in with another woman! I stepped closer to him and he just looked at me. "I love you, and I'm sorry! For not speaking up. I'm sorry for letting you go and not fighting for you! I'm sorry for everything!"
Queen I been accepted your apology and I'm sorry for everything I put you through and how I've treated you! I love you with all my heart but I forgive I don't forget. He turned the water off and grabbed his towel to get out the shower leaving me standing there....
