Advice Request
This person likes their best friend's ex-boyfriend.
Answered Submission
Hello,
Feelings are certainly complicated, but the best way to handle them is to be open and honest about them. Liking your best friend's ex can definitely feel awkward for both you and your friend, but ultimately, if you want to take your relationship with him any further, you have to be honest with her. Being secretive and sneaky will not bode well for your friendship, and any relationship built on an unsteady foundation is doomed before it starts. Being sneaky will only make her feel more betrayed and uncomfortable and perhaps even angry at the situation if she finds it out through someone else. If you want to date him, be honest with her. Tell her that you like him and you want to be with him, but you love and respect her too much to sneak around behind her back. She might not be a big fan of the idea depending on the circumstances of their breakup and what she may still feel for him, but you are both entitled to your own feelings.
If you don't want to date him or you know he doesn't feel the same way so you don't see yourself dating him in the near future, then you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. You shouldn't have to go to lengths to hide it, but you don't have the same obligation as her friend to talk to her about it. You can just let it rest as it is and move on with life.
What it comes down to is love. You love each other. You both want the best for each other. So be honest about your feelings.
I hope this helps, love. Message us again anytime!
Best,
The Advice Column Team
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