MY SAVIORS

Ch. 56. Burying a Heart

Eric (POV)

Upon discovering that I am Dorian's mate, I experienced a profound sense of sadness and a desire to let go of everything. I no longer wished to revisit the past when I was in love with Dorian. I question whether what I felt for him was truly love, but regardless, I don't want to see him unhappy. I am even willing to sacrifice my life for him if necessary. I chose to distance myself from him because I knew I would only cause him pain. I don't believe I am deserving of his love, and I feel guilty for coming between him and Lily, his girlfriend.

Now I understand why I was attracted to Dorian right from the start. The emotions I felt for him, his care and companionship, the time we spent together-those were the reasons my feelings for him grew so strong. His attentiveness to me brought me happiness, even if it meant strain in his relationship with Lily. It was evident that I had fallen deeply for him.

However, everything changed when Bloody came into my life. I find myself questioning if I truly loved Bloody as well, but these intense feelings appeared suddenly and vanished just as quickly. So, I must remind myself whenever I see William that my love for him is merely an illusion and not genuine.

There are times when I wish I could bury my heart and be free from the burden of emotions. They seem to be my adversaries. I also wish I could eliminate Ace, my inner wolf. If William were to witness the person I have become, he would likely despise me for hating his mate. Despite that, I believed I could love William, especially as he began to understand me. But now, all of that is gone.

I used to think I loved William more than Dorian. However, I am now uncertain if that is possible. I loved William, but I had stronger feelings for Dorian. I need to communicate the truth about our mate bonds and clarify the situation. If Dorian were to hurt William, Ace would be there to protect him. And if William were to harm Dorian, it would be my duty to shield him. It seems that my rationality has achieved over my emotions.

I am now faced with a difficult choice between Dorian and William. While William has Ace, who also loves him, Dorian only has me. I need to stay true to where I truly belong. William has both Ace and me, but Dorian only has me. I must suppress my romantic feelings for William and offer him my support as a friend. Additionally, I need to inform William that I am Dorian's mate when I find a good opportunity because I still don't know if William discover this, he could potentially harm or even kill Dorian? Despite Bloody's claims of understanding me, his love was based on an illusion. It's now clear to me what truly matters.

I need to tell Dorian the truth about my inner wolf. When I found out that he is my mate, I couldn't imagine being without him, whether it's love or something else. I won't let anyone, including myself, harm Dorian. I've realized that no one can take his place in my life. He is crucial in reminding me of my true self, especially when I feel lost due to my inner wolf.

The truth remains that Dorian can bring me a sense of belonging and help me understand my true self. I feel calm and relieved when I'm with him. However, William and Ace have complicated things. It is time for me to make a decision and move forward. I refuse to stand in the middle, torn between two paths. I must choose one direction to proceed, and I need Dorian by my side. Holding his hand reminds me of who I am, not a puppet controlled by Ace or an illusion of Bloody's mate.

After taking three days off from work and visiting my deceased parents, I returned and called Randy to arrange a meeting this evening. I had been considering whether to confide in Randy about my problems. While he seemed trustworthy, I decided to spend more time with him to investigate further.

Now, I can tell that Randy will be a friend with whom I can share my troubles. I will omit the fact that William is Bloody. I only need to inform Randy about my inner wolf because I require his assistance in protecting Dorian while Ace has control over me. I am unsure what they might do to Dorian. I know that Randy possesses Alpha-level strength and power, which he has kept hidden from everyone. This makes him a valuable ally.

Soon, I heard familiar footsteps approaching my room. It was Dorian, coming to see me. He opened the door and looked at me sitting on the bed.

Dorian: "Welcome back," he greeted me with a smile.

Eric: "Come here and give me a hug," I said, opening my arms.

He embraced me, resting his head on my shoulder while sitting on my lap. I wrapped my arms tightly around his waist, burying my head in his neck and planting a kiss on it. He was taken aback by my sudden action.

Dorian: "Are you really okay?" he asked me, concern in his eyes.

Eric: "Yeah," I smiled at him.

He gently held my face, peered into my eyes to check on me, and planted a soft kiss on my forehead. Then he held the back of my head and pulled me into another warm hug.

Eric: "Hey, Dorian, I can't breathe," I teased him.

Dorian: "Bear with it, because I missed you these days," he replied playfully.

Eric: "It's only been three days."

Dorian: "You didn't send me a text, so I was worried about you."

Eric: "I'm sor.... I mean... well, I was traveling, so..."

Dorian: "Okay, okay. It's fine as long as you're all good," he released me and stood up.

Eric: "I was just kidding about not being able to breathe. Who said you could stand up?" I grabbed his hand and pulled him back onto the bed, making him lie down beside me. Then I turned around my body to face him and wrapped my arms around him, nestling my head on his chest, listening to the rapid rhythm of his heartbeat.

Eric: "Let's stay like this for a while. I want to sleep," I said with a contented sigh.

Dorian: "But I still have work. It's only noon," he replied, a hint of reluctance in his voice.

Eric: "I'm more important than your work. Take care of your mate, will you?" I asked, lightheartedly.

Dorian: "Okayy... matey," he chuckled.

Eric: "Call me 'Husbby' instead," I joked with a playful smirk.

Dorian: "When will we get married?" he asked, a hint of curiosity in his tone.

Eric: "When I buy a ring, so for now, let me sleep," I closed my eyes while he ran his fingers through my hair. It was a moment of tranquil relief. I drifted off to sleep, listening to the soothing rhythm of his heartbeat.

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🖤Author Note: Aww........Sweet🖤

Another music (if you like to feel different) because sometime we are done with emotions.

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