City of Blind ✓

Numb

I want to dedicate this chapter to so many people that I am not dedicating it to anyone specifically. It is dedicated to every soul who supports me :)

Oooooooooooooooooookay, I messed a lot with you people yesterday and to make it upto you all, I am updating a little early (come on, I just woke up like 30 minutes ago.)

I am not gonna write much, coz mom is screaming on me to have my milk at this moment. So yeah, enjoy and I hope you like it :)

so here it is.

*Drum roll*

Here you go...

BTW, WHO IS HAPPY TO SEE IT?????????

~~~~~~~~~~

"Yo."

I looked up to see Felix removing his helmet and approaching me. Call me a people pusher, but the moment I saw him, I quickly stuffed my cleats in my bag and started walking away. Alex and Aiden were studying my every move but knew better than approaching me right now.

However, Felix didn't notice this thing.

"Whoa! What did I do? Why are you all cold suddenly? I even played nicely today!" he whined behind me. When I didn't stop, he grabbed my wrist and stopped me. "Astrid, come on! Get over it already. I am missing messing with you. It hurts to miss someone who is standing in front of you, you know."

I averted my eyes as tears started building in them. I am so done at this point. All I want is cookie dough, divergent series and my bed. I no longer feel like I am just Astrid. I feel like I am the problem-magnet-Astrid.

It sucks.

"I don't want to talk right now-"

"Bullshit. You desperately want to talk right now." He licked his lips and held my shoulder. "You were the one person who stood up for me despite hating me. You've been through a lot because of me and I am not letting you go through this alone."

I looked up at him with glistening eyes. I almost caved in for a moment before I shook my head and removed his hands off my shoulder.

"What I did for you, was out of pity. It doesn't mean anything to me, Brown. Get over it."

And with this, I stormed away.

Did I hurt him? Maybe.

But it was definitely better than trusting him, only to watch him leave me. Pushing people away is far better than being pushed away.

~~~~~~~~~~

Loner.

Absolute loner.

Never thought that an empty heart could feel so heavy. Never thought that love could suffocate. Never thought that air could drown. Never thought that numbness could inflict pain.

But here I am.

I successfully managed to push away the people who didn't leave on their own. Crying my heart out to sleep is suddenly a daily thing. My love for food is suddenly disgust. My love for life is suddenly a burden.

I feel so lifeless.

Everyone I ever cared about is a stranger to me. I never felt so alone in my life. My brothers have decided to give me some space but that doesn't mean that I don't notice them keeping a watch over me.

For the life of me, I can't understand why they are acting like this. If they think that it was a theft or kidnapping attempt then they are under danger too! Why am I feeling like they know something I don't?