hoodie || nh au

Thirty-six

The floor is cold but my blanket is warm. Luke and Josh's slight snores meet my ears. I pull the blanket further over my shoulders. My eyes stare at the screen in front of me. It's pitch black like everything else that's not illuminated by the moonlight. They all went to sleep two hours ago. It was one in the morning and now I'm still awake. Maybe I could just take a walk to the abdonned house and watch the night sky. I take my phone and write Niall a text where I'm at. He always has his phone on silent, so he'll see it tomorrow morning.

Me: I'm out for a walk. I'll be at the abdonned house. See you in a few hours.

I quietly go to the front door, pull my shoes and hoodie on and leave the mansion. Niall's parents still aren't back. They're probably away the weekend like my parents. My feet carry me along the path I walked so often. There are no people in the streets, not even a single car. Just some cats and racoons sneak around the street at this late hour of night time. I listen to the tunes of a playlist Luke made for me a few weeks ago when I was down. Photograph by Ed Sheeran rings through my ears. I love to take pictures. They keep memories forever. We can show them to our children and some even could get important for world history. When I arrive at the house, the moonlight shines through the hole on the side I met Niall. I make my way up to the roof in no time. My hands are dirty when I arrive at the top. The tiles are a little wet but I don't mind. I sit down with my arms wrapped around my legs. My eyes close automaticly. My head rests on my knees in comfort.

"I don't ever want to feel like I did that day, take me to the place I love, take me all the way", the Red Hot Chilly Peppers sound in my ear.

My head nods in the rhythem. I just want to be happy again. Happy like normal people. I want to wear normal clothes like tops, tanks, shorts and a Prom dress without being judged by other people. I want to have kids, a husband and a good income from my job at Niall's dad's place. I want to be the personal assistant to a reader and help them in any situation. Even if I just have to make a coffee. That would be an honor for me. Those people are the ones that bring out the new hits and bestsellers. They can either ruin a writers dream or make them popular and loved. I really want to help one of them plan their day and help them with sorting things out. I want to be at meetings and see all of the huge bosses and everything. Oh boy, this is going to be so hard. I lay down on my back, looking up at the sky. One day I'll be happy, too. Niall and I will probably not be friends until the end but for the next three to four years when he's still being tought how to take care of the business.

"It's just another night and I'm staring at the moon", Ed sings.

Jup, it's just another night and I am staring at the moon. Thanks, irony. The cool air nips on my skin. My hoodie isn't thick enough. It's just a thin one I like to wear in summer. My phone starts vibrating and the music turns off, so I look at the screen, taking out my earphones, unplugging them from my phone. Niall. I wait a few seconds but pick up the call anyway.

"Yes?", I ask quietly.

"Are you okay?", he whispers.

"Yes."

Such a lie. You know that I'm hurting you more every minute.

"Are you still there?", he asks.

"Yes", I tell him.

"I'll be there in ten minutes", he say.

I hang up, sitting up again and hugging my legs to my body. Niall should stay at his place and keep Christina in his arms. They are a couple. I don't want Christina to hate me more than she already does. Soon I hear footsteps inside the house. Niall humms on his way up to the roof. I put my phone and earphones in my hoodie pocket. He sits down next to me in his usual spot soon.