lovestruck † hs

Chapter 67

i listened to 'Say When' by The Fray whilst writing this as well as "Trust Me" by them, and i advise you listen to them too!

Rachel's POV

I turn around as the world continues to go around me and find Jacob, standing behind me a couple of feet with the hands in the pockets of his ripped jeans.

He looks me up and down, taking a deep breath. His eyes look exhausted, probably because he so stalkerly flew here just recently and the time change is killing him.

Though I wish more than just jet-lag was making him suffer right now.

"What the hell do you want." I cross my arms, my body instinctively wanting to protect itself from the man who bruised my body in more ways than one just a week ago.

We're in public, there's people here; he doesn't hurt me in public, I recall from previous experience.

"Don't get testy, I just... I want to talk, but in private. I promise, I won't lay a finger on you, just please." His tone is serious, much more genuine than I have ever heard as he gestures toward the small alley nearest to us.

"I have a life to get on with here that doesn't include you, so I gotta go," I begin to turn around.

"Rachel," he pleas, and I stop. "I'm trying to pour my heart out here, the least you could do is give me a listen. I'm here to just talk, I am legitimately being serious. I fucking spent thousands of dollars to get over here so I could tell you face to face. I will not leave until I have said my peace."

Well fuck.

"If you dare touch me, I swear Jacob—"

"Like I said, I will not lay a single finger of mine on you. People seem to be noticing you, and I've seen you on paparazzi pictures so I do quite suggest you join me, sweetheart," he points at the alley again, and I look around to see some stares I'm getting.

Jacob leads us to the alley, and I make sure we don't go too far deep, because I don't trust a cell in this boy's body.

"As I asked earlier, what the hell do you want," I stand by the wall opposite from him. "I have things to do." Like take a few more pregnancy tests.

He looks down, kicking his foot at the ground as he begins to scratch at the back of his neck with angst.

"I'm here because I have to get clarity for myself, I have to do this so I can stop feeling like shit like I have all week. I'm here to apologize," he says quickly.

Excuse me?

I open my mouth but he continues, "Let me finish. I was upset and I went back to how I was; I overreacted. I regret ever hurting you, and I shouldn't have done what I did because I'm a fucking idiot. I'm sorry for messing it up the first time I laid my hand on you," he says, his voice filled with regret. "I know that there is no way I can take back all the things I did to you. There's no way to take back what I said to you, and no way to take back the fact that I hurt you physically and mentally."

Jacob covers his face with his hands, shaking his head before looking back up at me, "But God, every single day I wish I could. I can't even look at you without wondering what we could've been if I didn't fuck up."