Imagine- Goodbye (Alec×Reader)

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Y/n's POV
  Here I laid. In a bed of my own tears. What a tragedy to happen to me. But I'll see a better place. I'll have my memories. I'll look down on everyone I've ever loved. And that's enough for me.

  I had a great life. Great friends by my side. A great love too. Alec. Oh how I would miss Alec. He didn't deserve this. He deserved a shadowhunter girlfriend who would live forever in his arms. Not a mundane girlfriend that was going to die soon because of cancer.

  However, that's not how the world works. I fell in love with him. He fell in love with me. We were inseparable for 4 years straight. We had our ups and downs, but we always came back to each other. Everything was perfect.

  Until, that day. The day the results came back revealing I had stage 3 lung cancer. According to the doctor, it was a gene passed down in my family.

  But I really wasn't listening. I was too focused on creating my bucket list. Trying to arrange all the events I wanted to do before I- well something happens.

  When I was closed to finish, I felt someone bring me into a tight hug. I still couldn't focus my hearing clearly, but I could still look to see Alec attached to me, squeezing the life out of me.

  I remember the next few months in a blur. I started chemo therapy. It was a painful experience, but I fought. Alec, Jace, Clary, and Izzy were all there for me through the whole thing.

  My hair began to fall out. I was embarrassed and insecure because of me being close to bald. Alec had to give so many talks about how beautiful I was without it. Chemo took so much away from me, but I fought.

  Fortunately, according to the doctor, the cancer was slowly shrinking. Every month, it would get smaller and smaller. I was happy. I fought. And I was so close to winning this hard battle.

  Until I wasn't.

  I was in the training room, training with Alec. Until, an uneasy feeling came upon me and I suddenly passed out. I could hear Alec trying to get me to open my eyes and screaming for help.

  I didn't open them until I was at the hospital. The doctors rushed to tell Alec that with my cancer being so dangerously close to my heart that, that's where it spread to. The cancer was spreading so fast they couldn't stop it.

  They put me on life support because with all the breathing tubes, I wouldn't be able to breathe.

  So, I laid. I sat in my own tears. Counting down the days. Alec never left the side of my bed. He practically lived at the hospital. He was always trying to convince me that I would fight through, but he knew deep, deep down that I wouldn't survive this.

  It was a normal Friday. Well, 'after getting put in the hospital' normal Friday. Alec would bring me my favorite meal and then we would cuddle and watch movies.

  I sat in my bed waiting for Alec to come back with my food, but then suddenly, I couldn't breathe. The breathing machine wasn't working anymore! My chest began to hurt like crazy and everything was fading in and out. I was able to stumble my hands onto the nurse button and press it.

  A beeping noise came crying through my room and I began to see my doctor and nurses rushing through the door. And in the crowd of nurses, I saw Alec's worried face. There were tears rushing down his face and he was trying to get through, but they pushed him back out.

  A few minutes later, I was stabilized. For now. As the doctor put it, this would be the last time I would be awake. I would slowly drift off to sleep and never wake up again.

  After thinking about it for a minute, it was the most peaceful way to die. Just drifting off into a silent slumber. Much better then getting hurt from a gun and then end up dead later.

  They finally let Alec in and he rushed over to my side, grabbing my hand tightly and sobbing into my neck. I wrapped my other hand around him and calmed him down, whispering 'I love you' over and over again.

  He finally let go and sat back down in his chair, still holding my hand for dear life.

  "I don't want you to go, Y/n." He cried, "You can't go, please!" He sobbed.

  "I wish it was up to me, Alec. If it was, I would spend an eternity with you, but I can't." He let out another sob, "But Alec, you listen to me! You move on from me. Marry someone else. Have kids. Live a long, healthy life. And never stop living your life because I'm not here to live it with you. I love you so much, words can not describe it. I wish we would've had our future. Gotten married, had kids, but it wasn't what was planned for me. Tell Jace, I won our hitting contest. I got the last hit." I laughed briefly, "And Izzy, tell her the red dress she searched days for, is actually hiding in my closet." I laughed again at the memory, "And Clary, tell her to marry Jace and do what she loves." I was almost finished with my speech. I could feel myself getting more and more tired. "And Alec, I love you. You made my life brighter. You made me want to be a better person, better friend, better girlfriend. It was all because of you. I wish we could spent the rest of our lives together, but that didn't quite work out, but it's OK. You have everyone else to help carry you along and get you through your days. Also, your Christmas present is under our bed and open it on Christmas Eve only. It's very special, so don't forget about it! And remember, I will always be with you." I smiled sadly, the tears running down my face.

  Alec cried and leaned forward to give our last kiss. He gave me hug and then leaned back just staring at me, capturing every detail.

  My eyes began to droop and I could feel myself growing more tired.

  "I love you Alec." I whispered.

  "I love you too, Y/n." He sobbed, kissing my forehead.

  I smiled and closed my eyes, slipping out of consciousness. My hand dropped out of his tight grip and fell in front of me.
 

   Alec opened the Christmas gift on Christmas Eve and inside was a ring engraved with Y/n's name on it and a book. But not just any book. A book full of pictures if them. From when they first met to now. Alec smiled softly while tears slowly fell down from his eyes. He looked up to the sky and smiled. "I love you, Y/n."
  Little did he know, Y/n was smiling back, saying "I love you too."

Now, Alec always mentions how I died with a smile on my face because I lived to the fullest and enjoyed what time I spent on earth. He also mentions how everyone that was included in my life was dear to me and how much I hated saying goodbye. And he was right. I love him and I hope he continues to live an amazing and full life.

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