Hopeless

Chapter thirty-four

Magnus' lips stroke Alecs. And Alec could barely describe the waves of emotion that rushed through his body. Then Magnus' and his lips parted. Alec didn't notice anything of his environment anymore, he only saw Magnus' dark brown eyes and he knew these eyes were what he wanted. Now and forever. And Magnus seemed to feel the same. "Magnus, I-", Alec whispered. "I don't care.", Magnus whispered and pressed his lips on Alecs. This kiss was so much more than the one before. It wasn't just a little sensation, it was a deep emotion, something that seemed to twist everything in Alec's heart. Twist it in the most positive way ever. He felt all his feelings for Magnus that he has locked in his chest being set free. He felt his whole body tingle as if he touched a socket. The love he felt was electrifying. He felt overwhelmed but also he wanted more. He wanted it all. He felt as if Magnus' lips were the air he needed to breathe, the love he has been so desperately longing for. That was the moment he realized how much he actually needed Magnus. His lips on Magnus' was the only thing he needed. He has never felt anything alike. Never. Alec felt Magnus' tongue exploring his teeth and although he knew this were probably just a few seconds, for Alec this kiss felt like minutes. And even those minutes were too short. He wanted an eternal amount of those minutes. He wanted to kiss Magnus and never let go. Now that he has tasted blood once he couldn't imagine life without it. He was addicted to his love. He was feeding on it. It was the essence of life, or at least for him it seemed as if it was. When Magnus drew his lips back Alec wanted to pull Magnus right back to him but he tried to calm down. Slowly but steadily he saw a smile building up on Magnus face. And he felt the same happening on his. And Magnus' smile was the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. Precious, but also so real. It all seemed as if he was trapped in a dream but also he has never felt more conscious. "Alec, this-", Magnus wanted to say with pure joy glittering in his eyes, causing little fireworks in Alec's heart. "This was perfect.", Alec finished. "It was.", Magnus added. Then their bubble burst and they realized they actually weren't alone. "This was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed in my life.", Isabelle sniffed. There were a few happy tears escaping her eyes but she seemed fulfilled with joy. Almost as Alec felt. But there was nobody who could just imagine how happy Alec was. He wanted to hug the whole world but also he didn't because all he wanted was Magnus in his arms and there was no space for anyone else. "This- wow.", Vivien sighed. Alec could discover some happy tears running down her cheeks too. Jace just sat there, completely overwhelmed. "Did that really just happen?", he stuttered. Everyone looked around. "I guess it did.", Magnus said with a wide smile making its way onto his face. "I suggest we give you guys some privacy.", Isabelle said and left the room, followed by Jace and Vivien. For some seconds Alec and Magnus just stood there in complete silence. Neither Alec nor Magnus had a single idea what to say. "Alec, I-", Magnus wanted to start but Alec shook his head:" Me first. Magnus, the first time I have seen you that night in the hospital, I immediately fell in love. It was love on first sight. And there were dozens of things I blamed it on, the stress, the meds, the overall circumstances. But the more normal the circumstances would get, the more I realized how much I actually need you. And I didn't want to tell you, scared that I would scare you off and ruin our friendship. So please, don't feel pressured." Magnus smiled weakly:" I feel pressured. But it's not you who is pressuring me. It's me. I am pressuring myself. Because what you just described was exactly what I felt, too. I fell for you when I first saw you and I couldn't get my mind off you. And now it feels as if I never will. Alec, I have been in relationships, kissed people, had sex- but not the craziest nights had made me feel such strong feelings like that kiss just did. I never thought I could actually feel like this. Alec, I care about you too. And it's not only caring. I want you to be close to me all the time. Seeing you smile makes me the happiest person alive. And I can't bear the thought of ever loosing you, Alexander. I want you. I need you. I think- I think I love you, Alec. I think I really do." Alec swallowed:" Magnus, I- I love you too. I can't imagine a day without your hand in mine and I want to call you my boyfriend. Maybe one day you will be my fiance. Or my husband. Either way, what matters is that you are close to me. That's all I want. This is all I am asking for- you. You would make me the happiest man alive." Magnus smiled delightfully:" I can only return that. So you can have me. All of me. In return I only ask of one thing- you." "You can have whatever you want, Magnus.", Alec whispered and sealed that promise with a kiss. It didn't feel as crazy as the previous one, but this was way more calm and trusting. And Alec trusted Magnus. "Should we tell them?", Magnus asked and Alec nodded. Then he took his hand and guided him to the bedroom where they saw Isabelle, Jace and Vivien sitting on the big bed. "So, I guess we have to tell you something.", Alec said. "Consider Alec my boyfriend.", Magnus said. Alec smiled and squeezed his hand a little tighter. "And consider Magnus mine." "Oh Alec."; Isabelle sighed and smiled the brightest smile he has ever seen.