Longing to Be Known | Levi Ackerman x OC

1

I shake the memory out of my mind. That happened 10 years ago 5 years before Wall Maria had fallen from the Titan's attack back when I was just 13. Maybe it was the fact that I was sat underneath the moon once again dangling my legs over Wall Rose peering out into the city in front of me that I recalled that moment. I couldn't help but wonder if the kid lived up to his words and became stronger to survive the first disaster against humanity in over a hundred years. Letting out a sigh, my best guess would be probably not.

After the fall of Wall Maria, the operations of all cities including the underground drastically changed. Refugees from Shiganshina flooded the gates of Trost in abundance which overwhelmed the state's ability to provide necessary items for their citizens. The underground was cramped where violence increased and left unattended even more than before because of the required forces needed to protect the new outer wall. It was only a matter of time before I was able to somehow make it here, at least, I'll be doing something with my life.

The memories of arriving in Trost are clear as day. I almost wish that their vividness would disappear deep into my subconscious so that I wouldn't have to cling on to the past. It was time to move on, but for some reason, I couldn't shake the unnerving and soul shaking experience of coming face to face with a titan for the first time.

Their beady eyes staring aimlessly into mine as they towered over my small stature was enough for adrenaline to course through my body. The image of people's bodies being clamped into theirs and crushed beneath the weight of their grasp was enough for me to continue moving towards the escape boats. Hearing the snapping of spines crumbling, giving way to the force exerted on their bodies was enough to create a twisted melody in my head.

The adrenaline rushing through me was exhilarating. I loved it. The uncertainty of it all made it all the more exciting for me, it was like a game.

A twisted, sick, game.

I didn't care though. I knew that regardless of which source the motivation was coming from, I needed it. I didn't let panic overflow through me and carefully worked out every possibility before coming to a conclusion; I had a better chance of staying clear from main roads and could possibly get closer to Wall Rose if I trailed near the outsides of the wall. So, I did just that.

Jumping from house to house, I danced across the rooftops with ease, silently thanking myself for being a thief in the first place. I had no worries whether or not I'd be accepted in Trost, nobody had time to care for the illegal things I participated in.

I just had to get there first.

"Kaisa, we really need you to get some rest before the expedition tomorrow."

I didn't have to turn around to recognize the voice interrupting my thoughts behind me; it was none other than commander Erwin Smith. I turn my head to the side in his direction.

"I don't really mean to question your authority, sir, but is it really a good idea to bring the new cadets on this mission? Doesn't that seem a bit reckless?" I question.

"They have to learn somehow. We don't have the time to train them further and at least this way they'll figure out if they're suitable for the Survey Corps" He answered.

I swing my legs back over the wall to face Erwin's calm features. His short blonde hair and bushy brows carved his face out almost too perfectly, not to mention his tall figure. It was clear why many cadets tried to find themselves in his favour. He extends an arm towards me and I link a hand into his before he gives a slight tug bringing me to my feet before I give a little jump.

"I'm impressed you have enough energy to follow through with your little quirks. Maybe you should give some of that life to the other squad leaders" he snickered. I looked back up at him with a smirk as we begin walking in the direction of our housing hall.

"Tsk, I'm pretty sure that Hanji will better suit that role better than I will. Plus, we wouldn't want all squad leaders to act like they're on some sort of weird drug, imagine what kind of chaos would ensue."

He looks down at me with a concerned face. "Okay, so maybe it wouldn't be the best idea, but you definitely have an influence on the entire team."

I shrug my shoulders. "It's only because I've managed to master the balance of logic and idiotic tendencies; if you can't beat em, join em"

Erwin shakes his head as we make our way down the wall using our ODM gear. I hook myself into the side of the stone wall of our home and swing towards it doing a little flip before landing on my feet. The air through my hair is more than enough to elevate my mood, ODM gave me a way to feel free in such a constrained environment.

"Get yourself to bed and try to contain yourself from doing anything more than walking." Erwin comments. I wave my hand as to say goodbye calling out to him as I walked in the direction opposite of him.

"You know I can't help it. Always gotta keep practicing, otherwise I'll end up dead."

I turn the corner, climb the stairs to the squad leader wing before reaching my door. I plop myself on the bed and pass out with my blanket spilled over me, succumbing to the bliss of nothingness.

--

hi hey hello!

i hope you guys enjoyed this update :) let me know what you think about the chapters too far so i can incorporate any ideas or suggestions you have for my writing!

if you did enjoy this, please let me know through a vote or through a comment, it really helps me to keep going. i'm currently setting up the entire book through these chapters so im thankful for your patience before levi enters this world.

much love and take care,

~cendiain