Magicians Pet (🔞Hisoka Smut🔞)

Breaking Point

Kinta
"Hisoka?" Kinta murmured gently, it'd been a while since she'd heard anything from the magician. She'd been driving for quite a while, slowly making her way back to Zaban City. She stole a glance at the man, his head had rolled to the side and his eyes were closed, he was asleep.
"Should I take him to a hospital?" Kinta murmured to herself. Sure she'd stopped most of the bleeding, but what if she'd missed something? "Damnit."
She gripped the steering wheel tightly as she focused on the road, Hisoka had gotten hurt, he'd almost died and it was all her fault. Kinta had never once considered that her magic man could get killed in this endeavour of her's to kill her father, she'd always assumed he was too strong for that. She had felt his distress through the nen items and didn't hesitate to come racing back to his side, she'd known that if Hisoka of all people was in distress it had to be serious. She hadn't even considered the fact that she was giving up the best possible opportunity to kill her father. Her only thought was to save her magician. Arthur had gotten away, this was probably his plan.
Kinta wasn't sure what she'd expected after she'd killed the sniper and found Hisoka and Cody, but seeing Hisoka bleeding out on the ground- with Cody being the cause of his agony had ignited a rage inside of her that Kinta didn't even know she was capable of. And after Hisoka had passed out, she hadn't just "lost her shit" a little, she'd gone absolutely ballistic. The only thought on her mind was that her Magic Man was dying, not what Cody had done to her, only that he was the cause for Hisoka's condition. She didn't even remember what exactly she'd done, she remembered feeling an overwhelming amount of rage, and the power that had come with said rage. The electricity singing through her veins as she remembered the sound of Cody's flesh tearing, his screams, hot blood splattering across her skin and his bones crunching under her hands. When she came to, he was in pieces all over the clearing, only then was Kinta able to think clearly enough to retrieve the medical kit from her bag.
The agony she'd felt in her chest as she'd done her best to stitch the worst of his wounds, luckily all the bullets had gone through, she didn't need to fish any out. The panic she'd felt as she listened to Hisoka's ragged breaths, cradling his head in her lap, her hands trembling as she wrapped his wounds, all the while she'd been begging him to be okay. Begging him not to leave her.
"Fuck." Kinta murmured again, to think she'd been just about to kill the magician earlier today. Yet, when he'd almost died by another's hand, she'd fought to keep him alive. What the hell was she going to do when it came time for their fight? She couldn't kill Hisoka, this had proved it to her. So where does that leave her? Just letting him kill her?
Hisoka groaned softly and twitched in his sleep, his breaths becoming sharp as she felt his anxiety rise in his aura. He was dreaming again, he'd been dreaming when he was passed out in her lap too, Kinta wondered what he'd been dreaming about.
"Hisoka?" She called out to him gently as his face contorted with pain, she carefully reached out to him and ran her fingers through his hair.
He inhaled sharply as his eyes popped open, blinking a few times as he carefully righted himself again. "I fell asleep~?"
"That's okay, we're almost to the city. We'll get you to the hospital." Kinta gave him her best reassuring smile as she tried to focus on the road, nearing the entrance to the city.
"No hospitals~" Hisoka sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. "I just need to rest for a couple days, then I'll be fine~"
Kinta pursed her lips, she didn't like that answer but she had a feeling that arguing with him wasn't going to get her anywhere. "So you just wanna check into a hotel?"
The magician nodded silently as he started twisting the bracelet on his wrist again, Kinta could still feel the anxiety in his aura. Something was off, since when did Hisoka get anxious?
"Are you okay?" She murmured gently.
"It's cute that you're worrying so much~" He chuckled. "I told you, I just need a couple days to heal~"
"No, numb nuts up there-" She reached over the small sports car and poked him in the temple. "You seem to forget that our emotions are kinda linked with these nen items, I know something is bothering you."
"Hmm~" Hisoka rubbed the spot she'd poked him with his fingers tiredly.
Kinta stayed silent as he mulled over his answer, driving through the narrow city streets took a lot more concentration than the wide open country roads anyways. She spotted a hotel and carefully pulled into the parking lot, having to readjust the car so it was straight in the parking space before taking the keys out of the ignition.
"Not bad Kitten~" Hisoka smiled as she stepped out of the car and headed for the front door, he was already walking better than before.
Kinta checked them into a room while Hisoka waited on the far side of the lobby, leaning against the wall and ignoring the horrified looks of others, she'd almost forgotten that they were both covered in blood. They went to their room in silence, but Kinta could still feel the anxiety in Hisoka's aura.
"Are you gonna tell me what's wrong?" Kinta sighed as she opened the door for him.
Hisoka walked straight to one of the reclining chairs and flopped down in it heavily, letting his head rest against the back of it as he looked up at the ceiling. "I was wrong, Kinta~"
She furrowed her brow as she set her backpack down and looked around the room. They were on the third floor, it wasn't exactly a luxury hotel but it wasn't shabby either. There was no balcony but it had a nice view of the water, a tiny kitchen and a living room/bedroom in one space.
"What are you talking about?"
"I didn't understand how you felt~" He sighed again. "When Cody attacked you last, I thought I did but that~ being frozen like that~" He shivered, his golden eyes seemed to glaze over as he stared at the ceiling.
Kinta's eyes went wide, oh god, she hadn't even considered this. Not only had this endeavor of her's caused Hisoka immense physical pain, but what Cody did to him had probably triggered painful memories from his past. That's why she could feel the anxiety rolling off of him, and why he seemed to be in so much pain in his dreams. He was reliving his past in his head.
"Hisoka-" Kinta's chest constricted painfully as she walked towards him. "I'm- sorry-" Her voice cracked as she sunk to her knees by his feet, causing the magician to snap his gaze back to hers with a confused expression. "I'm so sorry-"
"Why? Kinta~" He sat up in the chair, wincing at the pain as he reached out to her but she pulled away from his hand.
God she was a monster, even worse than he was. She was using him, she'd used him to get stronger, she'd used him for protection, to satisfy her physical needs, then she'd almost killed him for what? Because she was afraid he'd trapped her? Then she'd had the audacity to send him off to fight HER battle and almost got him killed. It sure didn't feel like Kinta was trapped in his web, right now, it felt like Hisoka was trapped in hers. And she felt awful about it.
"What's with you~? Why are you crying~?" Hisoka rested his elbows on his knees as he cocked his head at her, but Kinta kept her head bowed as she stared at the floor. "Look at me~"
"It's all my fault-" Kinta spoke slowly, keeping her head bowed as she tried not to let her voice break. "It's my fault you got hurt- that was my battle to fight and I- I sent you after Cody instead-"
"Kitten~" Hisoka started but she interrupted him.
"You almost died! Hisoka- for what?! For- for some toy that you're just going to get tired of and discard some day?!" She still couldn't look him in the eyes as a soft sob escaped her lips, she tried to stifle herself with her hand but it wouldn't stop. "Damnit Hisoka! Why-? Why are you doing all of this? Why would you go to such lengths- just for something you plan on throwing away?!"
The magician fell silent as Kinta angrily swiped her tears away, but they didnt stop. She hadn't realized just how much of a damn she'd built up to keep her emotions at bay, she'd hoped some time away from Hisoka would quell them but after today, her dam was crumbling. She wasn't just crying because she'd fallen for a man who'd never love her, she cried for how alone she felt in this world, for her child self that never knew what it felt like to be loved- that'd done everything she could to prove herself to her family, only to be met with the business end of a whip. She cried for her adult self that'd gotten a taste of friendship and love, only to have it ripped away from her over and over again. Kinta cried because she realized that she'd never kill Hisoka, which meant either her father would kill her or the magician would. Either way, she'd never get what she'd always craved out of life, somebody-anybody that loved her. Kinta would die the same way she came into this world, alone. All of this, her training, the pain she'd endured, the people she'd killed, her ambitions, her very life itself- meant nothing.
"Damnit!" She pushed herself to her feet as her hands trembled, her breath coming in quick spurts as it felt like she was drowning in her emotions. The deep, empty ache she'd felt in her chest these last few weeks escalated into a sharp, white hot pain. It felt like her heart was literally breaking into two as she tried to force herself to take deep breaths. But it didn't work, Kinta had finally hit her breaking point. She simply couldn't stand this pain any longer.
"Kinta, calm down~" She heard Hisoka's voice, but he sounded so far away.
This was all for nothing, none of this meant anything, what was the point? Kinta had never been one to deal with her emotions, she just bottled them up, hid them behind her dam and forgot about them. But now, her dam had been cracking for a while now and todays events had sent it crumbling down. She was drowning in emotions that she couldn't process, panic began to claw at her throat as she backed towards the door.
Hisoka slowly stood from the chair, stepping towards her cautiously like he was approaching some wounded, wild animal. She might as well be at this point. His golden eyes where full of pity and confusion, of course he felt sorry for her, this was pathetic. A stupid girl who couldn't control her emotions crying over the loss of something she never had.
The panic over her inability to process the flood of emotion fogged her brain, stifling a cry that erupted from her chest with her hand as she turned and flung the door open.
"What are you~ Ki~ Kinta! Wait~! Kinta!"