BloodBond~Prinxiety

79

"So... do I want to know what that fight with Remus was about?" Logan asked several days later when he and Roman were to go over his tux alone. Roman just sat there in one of the study chairs, dazed and out of it, as he had been since the fight.

"You don't think I'm weak do you?" Logan's eyes darkened as watched Roman stare blankly at the paper before him without the slightest reaction.

"That depends."

"So you do think I'm weak." Logan groaned as he forced himself to sit down catching the broken royal's gaze.

"I said that it depends."

"On what? I'm either weak or I'm not."

"Well, that's just not true." Roman's eyes narrowed in confusion as Logan shook his head. "That's hyper generalizing something so proud and vague. There is an array of different strengths a person can have and to simply say 'you're either weak or you're not' is just unfair to those who might not have the same as you." Roman didn't bother to respond as he returned to staring off at nothing. "Roman... As I said... with you it depends."

"On what?" Logan's eyes darkened again as he frowned over just how upset the King was over it all.

"In terms of Vampiric ability, you are literally the strongest I have ever known. You surpass that of Remus and he is the oldest meaning he should be the strongest." Roman smiled slightly only to pause as Logan sighed. "However..."

"However?"

"In terms of Bravery..." Roman's eyes shot wide as Logan shook his head with a sad look. "You are lacking greatly."

"In bravery? How am I lacking in..."

"You let your fears stop you..."

"HOW AM I NOT BRAVE?!" Roman cut back in with a panicked expression. "I've fought against hunters. I've fought in wars. I've hunted down terrible people. How can I... of all people... not be brave?"

"For starters... you are not afraid of hunters." Roman crashed as Logan's voice came out pointed and obvious. "You are just angry about them... not fearful. In terms of bravery... Virgil is the strongest out of everyone. Willing to face the possibility of death to make sure his loved one was cared for."

"Don't..." Roman choked as that familiar burn in him started to take over. "Please don't."

"See." Roman winced as Logan's face softened in concern. "You let your fears rule you."

"I don't... I don't understand."

"You were scared of losing Virgil." Roman frowned as he glanced up to see the sadness in his friend's eyes. "So you pushed him away and forced yourself to treat him like a child so you wouldn't have to face the agony of when he left you." Roman's eyes dazed as Logan simply continued on. "That's a fear you still have. You're so scared of losing, Virgil. You're terrified of even letting him out of your sight. Don't think I didn't notice the look you gave him when Patton offered to take him to town to go over wedding plans."

"I'm not... I'm wea-... weak." Roman whined as started to tremble. "I'm not. I can't be. I... I can't be."

"Roman listen to yourself. You can't be weak? Why can't you be weak? It's impossible to think one single person can be perfect in everything... invulnerable. It's just not realistic."

"I HAVE TO BE!"

"Why?" was all Logan said making Roman completely crash into the silence.

"I can't lose him." Roman whispered as his mind finally latched on to what Logan was saying. "I... I can't be weak... because I have to be able to protect him. I can't... I can't lose, Virgil."

"You're scared." Roman's eyes softened as the realization all swarmed about his mind. "You've always been scared of being weak. Of being judged... of being perceived as unworthy. When you started to feel for Virgil that fear only grew. You're fear of not being good enough latched onto him. Roman..." Logan sighed as he pushed the papers away from him to focus solely on his friend. "You are not weak by any standard of the word... but you are a coward." Roman flinched only making Logan's heart drop. 

"I... I don't want... to be."

"Then you need to pinpoint ways you can work on your fears." Roman frowned in confusion as Logan shrugged. "I'm not saying to not be afraid. Courage is not the absence of fear but of not letting it control you. Of looking your fear in the eye and walking forward despite it. THAT is what you need to work on. You need to learn that it's ok to be afraid... and maybe..." Roman clenched his fists tightly as he tried to think everything over listening to every world Logan told him. "Maybe that starts with learning that it's ok... to be a little weak."

"It's ok?" Roman mumbled half-consciously to himself as his mind started to spiral. "Ok... to be weak?" Logan quickly cleared his throat making Roman glance over at him, not wanting the royal to spiral too much without some sort of direction. "Logan?"

"Let's refocus on the wedding. You still have a tux you need to design." Roman's eyes dazed even more as his mind filled with thoughts about Virgil. A bright smile formed lazily on his lips as he nodded. "Good. I'm sure that you'll at least enjoy this."

"I'm marrying Virgil." Roman mumbled happily as he giggled as he leaned his head against his hand. "I love him so much."

"I know you do, Roman." Roman just nodded as he started to trace shaped into the wood of the table. 

"Virgil's favorite color is purple." Roman closed his eyes as he tried to envision everything. "I want purple."

"You want... to wear purple?" Logan had to admit he was actually a bit shocked to see Roman nod. "I thought you'd want the two of you to be red."

"No. No, it has to be purple." Roman pouted sadly as he shook his head. "It's Virgil's color. His favorite color. I want it to be purple. Purple and gold maybe?" 

"I can work with that." Logan chuckled softly as he started to write things down.

"Black suit with purple and gold accents... a white and purple mantle and... and a deep dark red rose brooch. I think that would be perfect." Roman purred at the vision in his mind as he laid his head against the table. "Can we do that? Can we make it purple?"

"Yes, Roman. We can do that." Roman's eyes lit up as he purred even louder.

"Yay." Roman giggled as he sat up and scotched closer to the table. "Can we start drawing now? I want to try and get it all down so we can talk to Patton about it. I want it to be obvious I'm Virgil's." Logan's eyes snapped up instantly as ROman choked and suddenly backtracked. "I-I mean that Virgil's mine. You know... That he's my m-mate."

"As you wish my king."