𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚒 𝚐𝚊𝚖𝚋𝚒𝚝 III chishiya x female reader *discontinued*

chapter 41

Chishiya wasn't always cold.

I was mad that he was so oblivious about the warmth that always washed over me when he touched me. I knew he didn't mean it only in the physical spectrum, the way he said those words, it was he was like warning me from his own twisted perception of himself. I gazed at the rose in front of me heatedly, the cold quietly biting my skin, but it was nothing I wouldn't survive.

It was really funny though, the fact that he has a dagger in his pocket and I have zero fear in my veins tells a lot about not me, but him. He is a seducer, a great one, one look with the feline eyes could alter with any women's heart. There were many whispers I heard during my stay here, Chishiya being the voluntary outcast, but also the sayings that some girls gushed over him, telling how mysterious and supposedly good lover he was.

I smiled and nodded my head a little bit, wondering if he was actually that promiscuous as others have said and supposedly experienced. Did I feel jealous? No, I didn't give a fuck honestly, since I knew they were just a fling, dirt beneath his shoes. Maybe we never went to the lengths of having sex, but to some extent I was glad. I wasn't entirely skilled in that region.

„Is this your rose?" I asked as I glanced at Chishiya, curious about the flower's sole of existence. „No. I have been here only once before." the words came from his mouth before he looked away to the side, while I cocked my head and hm-ed. The cut on my hand still stung, the blood around it dry and nasty, even if the gash wasn't that deep, it still hurt. I quickly inserted my hands into my pockets, not wanting to deal with it, rather enjoying the garden.

I side-stepped the pot, going further away, inspecting the various plants that surrounded me. I always had an inclination towards flowers, everything I owned when I was younger had some floral pattern on it, my dad buying me a bouquet of tulips on my birthdays. It made the repressed memories come back, the coping mechanism of forgetting crashing more and more every day.

There were many times where I would have an episode where I would remember things that I buried under the dirt, completely messing with my brain. I didn't know what was real, what I did, what others said. Of course, right after I would now bury myself in alcohol, wasting my life with Niragi at the time, dancing around the smoked and blurry apartments we often landed in.

I didn't know anyone, they were all strangers, but still, we acted like best friends, sharing the same glass. I never remembered their names or faces, only their red glossy eyes staring at me, their hands on my hips as we innocently danced in the middle of the room, either to some 80's songs or in contrast swinging wildly at some dubstep. 

My life now felt almost bland as my now healed hand touched the petals of the white Lilies, the aroma already making it to my nose. It was weird how can a smell itch the tip of your nose so much, it's like it is actually touching you with its imaginary hand. I pulled away as the sensation grew more irritating, almost sneezing but I stopped my instincts as I actually realized what is happening.

A butterfly.

On my fucking nose.

Yes, there he was, staring at me directly into my eyes while he flapped his light-colored wings in the air. I had to cross my eyes to see the little creature, probably looking like a resident of a mental institution at the moment but I didn't care. I gazed at him, for some odd reason getting masculine vibes amongst the feminine appearance. It was magical, feeling its little feet slowly come closer and stand on the bridge of my nose.

„Chishiya look." I quietly whispered so the butterfly doesn't fly away scared, slowly turning my head in Blondie's direction, the man now standing few meters away from me. It didn't feel like that, but ten minutes already passed from the rose meeting we had, me going on a little exploring with Chishiya following and stalking me but keeping his distance. I could feel his intense gaze on my face the whole time I was skipping through the rays of flowers, but I rather ignored that fact.