𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚒 𝚐𝚊𝚖𝚋𝚒𝚝 III chishiya x female reader *discontinued*

chapter 55

People always say that only you yourself can achieve your goals. They say that nobody can truly heal you, or make decisions in your life. And I wish it was like that, I wish that I could be the leader of my existence, the coordinator of the steps I am taking. But we all know that the power of being the one who controls doesn't lay in singularity - in being self-important.

I learned from a young age that fairness or logic aren't concerned in this seemingly unachievable power, and that only those who understand their own intentions in using it can truly carry it. Money, for instance, is something everyone has in at least one moment in their life. Does it mean that they controlled others? No. Most don't have the desire to do that.

And those who had the yearning to be manipulative, had to have two more things with the money to actually pull the strings. Brains and cold attitude. The two most important things that in most cases ensure your survival in this world, can only save you in the real universal plane with the use of money.

With these three traits, the humans were mostly criminals, masterminds, master manipulators, or just common citizens, with dark secrets locked in their souls. 

We all have at least one of these specimens in our lives, that made no less than one decision for you, maybe helped you achieve something, or oddly enough even heal you. They were bad people morally, the society outcasting them for having the personality of a dangerous individual. And indeed, they weren't safe to be around, but would it be really wrong to say that they were utterly addictive?

I knew only one person who was like that, and as I once again found myself alone, skipping through the Beach, his stupid face popped in my head, reminding me about his existence. I gripped the walkie-talkie tighter, the sun that fell sharply at my face almost burned me, the spotless sky not offering me any type of cloud- cover.

It was soundless, peaceful even, the people-empty pool full of colorful floaties, the music stopped, only the birds chirping in the afternoon wind heard through the makeshift valley. My hair flew around my face, but I didn't bother to sweep the strands away, as I emptily gazed onto the distant buildings.

The sun was slowly setting, but high in the sky, reflecting on the river between us and the game arenas. I was desperate, maybe even so hopeless that I just simply cease to care. The funniest part was the fact, that I could do anything right now. I had freedom, at least to the eye, no law, no police, no money to stop me.

And still, I stood on the pavement, motionlessly, not taking any action.

I was so mad at myself, not coming up with anything that I could do, or perhaps overcome the fear of moving the wrong chess pieces. Niragi was one if I would go into the mindset of a player, but, even with the small victory dance I did in my head as I walked away from his chuckling form, only now I realized how unusable he is.

I pursued my lips as I felt the weird feeling wash over me again, but now as if slightly more familiar, my subconscious picking up the vibes slowly. I shook my head and then winced, the fast motion not helping my injuries. I tsk-ed pathetically, hauling myself on the ground carelessly, my legs tired.

At first, my plan was to simply go into Hatter's room, find someone who could help me, or maybe hide until Arisu would come inside and try to warn him. Of course, that was out of the table since my ass was by the pool, nothing around me to use. Well...

The cold metal did bit my skin, as I grazed my fingers on the small radio for what seems to be the hundredth time, the object truly tempting. At least I had some sort of communication with my group, and I couldn't help but let a small smile slip on my face as I remembered who left it on the counter for me.