Macgyver Imagines

"Relaspe"

Song: 'Relaspe' By: Carrie Underwood

......

"If anyone asks, you never saw me
And I know you know better than to call me
Let's just hide out under the covers
One more secret between two old lovers
What can it hurt?"

You shouldn't be doing this, this right here, what your about to do, is wrong. It's only going to hurt you and him more once the aftermath hits. Yet here you are, standing outside his front door, trying to talk yourself out of ringing that doorbell. Don't do it! You can't take it back once it's done!

Pushing all those thoughts to the side you finally ring that doorbell, it's 2 am and here you are. You had so many mixed emotions, hoping to God he sleeps through that doorbell, but the other side of you wanted nothing more than to see his face. Soon the door opened, standing in the doorway was half asleep Mac, hair sticking out at every direction but he never looked more handsome. All he had on was a pair of cotton flannel pajama bottoms, leaving his whole chest exposed and your eyes could not look away.

"Y/n? What are you doing here? It's late." He said trying to rub the sleepy out of his eyes, then he finally let it sink in. "Are you ok? It looks like you've been crying?" All you could do was stand there, trying to come up with the right thing to say. Since you couldn't come up with anything you just jumped him, wrapping your arms around his neck, as you kissed him with everything you had. You could tell he hesitated at first before reciprocating the kiss. He reached behind you to close the door shut, before holding your body in his arms.

"Mm y/n we shouldn't be doing this." He mumbled against your lips but not pulling away. Knowing he was right you slowly pulled away, not wanting to get lost in his eyes you decided to look down instead. "I know, I know we broke up, and I know why we did. We just couldn't make it work, but I miss you. I miss you so much it hurts. I can't eat, I can't sleep, everything in my apartment reminds me of you. The pillow next to me where you use to be still smells like you. I still have one of your hoodies, that I wear all the time just to feel close to you." You finally looked up into his eyes, seeing how he was feeling by just his eyes. You could tell he was struggling with the same thing you were.

You took his hands and moved them up to your face, so he could cup the sides of your face. "Please make love to me one last time. All I need is one more time, then I'll leave you alone. I'll walk out of your life for good, I just need to feel you one last time, all of you. I need to feel your skin against mine, your lips on every inch of my body, your breath on my neck, your hair brushing lightly over my forehead as you hover over top of me. That burning desire I get throughout my whole body when your inside me, I need it. I need you." You swallowed the feeling of tightness in your throat when you felt some more tears escape.

Macs eyes darkened as he heard you say those little confessions, never taking his eyes off you. "I've missed you too." He leaned down to kiss you softly but urgently at the same time. He picked you up by your thighs, as you legs wrapped around his waist in response. Guiding you to the bedroom, he laid you gently on the bed. As each piece of fabric you were wearing was slowly being peeled off he began to talk. "I've missed everything about you. Your perfume still lingers on my clothes. A tube of your lipgloss still sits on the counter of my bathroom sink, I can't bring myself to throw it away. I can't think about anything all day but you. When I'm on a mission I'm still thinking about you. What if something happens to me? What if I die and died not being with the woman I love? Or has she already moved on from me? Has she forgotten about me?" By the time he finished that sentence were already laying there fully exposed. You sat up to take his face in your hands this time "Don't you ever talk like that again. I could never forget you. You were my first love. Your still the man I love. I don't see myself ever loving someone again the way I loved you. Or finding someone to love me like you did. Mac, I love you." Your pressed your lips against his as your hands threading through his golden locks. You could hear Macs moan ringing in your ears as you began to pull down his pants.

"I ain't hung up on you
I ain't in love with you
This is just time that I'm wasting
One or two little sips
I'm alright, I can quit
You're just someone that I'm tasting"

Time had passed after you two had made love, as you laid there tangled in the sheets with him your heart ached. Knowing after tonight that was it. You would have to leave but for now you both laid in silence, Mac gently stroking your hair. Your mind wandering to the past, when you guys could make it work, you shared so many happy memories. He was your first for alot of milestones. First kiss, first time, first boyfriend, first love. There would never be another Mac. You couldn't be with him though, you couldn't handle what he did for a living. At first you thought the two of you could take on any obstacle, as long as you loved eachother. That wasn't the case, you couldn't handle days or weeks without hearing from him because he couldn't contact you during a mission. The thought of him being hurt and you not knowing about it kept you up every night. Then with the mental and emotional turmoil Murdoc and Codex had put him through, you couldn't recognize him anymore. He had changed, you wanted to fight for the two of you, to not leave him during such a difficult time in his life but it was too much. Then you realized that wanting to stay just to "fix him" wasn't fair to either of you. So you both ended things. Yet here you were.

Looking over at the red lit numbers illuminating off of the alarm clock, it read 4:00 am. You then turned to see a sleeping Mac, slightly snoring, he looked so at peace. You frowned, knowing what you had to do. As you tried to quietly get out of bed to not wake him, you tried to fight the tears that threatened to escape your eyes. Once you were finally dressed, you grabbed your purse and then turned to look at Mac. On the verge of now blubbering you let out a small whisper, before turning to walk out of his life for good. The last words you ever were to say to him being....

"Goodbye Mac."

"I can quit when I'm ready (I can quit)
I ain't hurting nobody but me."