I'm Fine | Beyond The Scene™

PART 23

Part 23:
War Of Hormone

Jeon Jung Kook

I was drawing some random sketches in a sketch pad that was given to me by nurse Kate when she learned that I love drawing while I wore both of my earphones in my ear listening to music.

I am currently sitting at the bench on the garden with Sana who was busy with I don't know. She was just sitting beside me all this time. While I was busy drawing without bothering on showing it to her.

Since my music was in full volume, I can't hear anything from the surrounding aside from it. She pinched me in the arm that made me stop from drawing as I glared at her before going back to my business.

This time she didn't just pinched me, she took off my other earphone as she pointed to the group of people in front of us. I simply look up with a bored expression before resuming on my drawing.

She nudge me harder this time that made me lift up my gaze. The elderly must have went out to get a glimpse of sunshine in this fine weather. She then again tapped me in the arm to grab my attention.

"What? Do you want to go there? Go ahead and don't mind me over here." I asked her as she pointed in front of the elderly. By the looks of it she looks like she wants to go in there.

"Let's go out there and check what is it... Do you want me to help you up?" she asked as she got up, while I just shake my head no then placed the paper in the side with my pencil before getting up using the crutches.

I forget that I can already walk through the assistance of crutches instead of going around in wheel chair. I can now walk but not yet like before because clearly I still have to use crutches.

Good thing the therapy and prescriptions were very effective for my fast recovery. Plus I did my best to follow what the doctors and nurses had told me. I tried not to be hard headed.

I had already said to her that I could stand up on my own already but he was hard headed as she helped me, rather assisted me to the back of the elderly that made us see what was really going on in there.

She made sure to take her steps slowly so I could keep up with her pace. When we looked at the front we both saw a girl performing in front of everyone with her guitar as her accompaniment.

"Chaeyoung? Does she mean that today is the day that she is actually going to visit me?" Sana asked as she looked at the girl who is performing right in front of everyone with happy melodies.

"You know her?" I asked as she nodded her head. "We are childhood friends in Japan more than that we are actually best friends, we actually grew up together until when we turned teens.
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I was permanently admitted to hospitals while she trained to be a lyricist in an entertainment company. Now she is a lyricist already and an album artist." she said as I nodded my head.

I looked again at the girl who was performing in front as I noticed a lighter hanging at the in her end of the guitar. It had the initials of Y.K. it can't be possibly talking about Yoongi hyung right?

There must be a lot of Korean with the initials of Y.K. right? I can't pay attention to what she is performing because I am engrossed with the lighter and the initials in it.

Plus I have been bombarded with memories of me and Yoongi hyung and the others. He was the one who taught me how to play the piano. Yoongi hyung is the quiet type of guy cold in the outside but sweet in the inside.

I suddenly missed my friends being here for quite some time and also for not meeting any of them for more than two years but at the same time I don't want to leave and be better.

The reason is because I don't want to leave Sana alone. Spending time with her almost the whole duration of my stay in here made me closer to her and at the same time made my feelings so confuse.

She become the reason why I want to get better and learn to stand up again but at the same time the reason why I did not want to leave afterwards. My feelings are in a dire state of in between wanting to hug her, keep her, kiss her and make her mine.

But at the same time, turn around and never tell her what I feel afraid to be rejected like nothing. I know that she only sees me as a friend and nothing more than that and it makes me more sad about the thought of it.

"What? What's going on?" I asked Sana when she hit me in the arm that made me flinch and get away from the thoughts that had keep me idling for a few minutes.

"She's already done and you didn't even bother to listen... Come, I will introduce you to my friend." she said as she assisted me and we slowly approached her friend who was keeping away her guitar in its case.

"Chaeyoung, I am quite disappointed that you didn't tell me that you are actually visiting me today..." Sana started that made the girl stop from what she was doing as she looked up to see who was talking to her.

"Sorry Sana, I intended to keep it a surprise. It would not be a surprise if I told you right? But I told you in the letter that I'll be here by weekend right? Miss me so much?"

The girl said as she gave a hug to Sana as she immediately returned the hug to that girl named Chaeyoung. "Who is he by the way?" she asked while pointing out to me when they broke the hug.

"Chae, his name is Jungkook and he is a friend of mine... Kook, this is Chaeyoung my childhood friend and my very best friend..." Sana said while introducing us to each other. "Nice to meet you..." she said as I just nodded my head in response.

Chaeyoung is actually shorter than Sana, so she had to look up to me when Sana introduced us. "Chae? Oh gosh! You are engaged?" Sana squealed when she saw a ring on the girl's finger while Chaeyoung just shyly nodded.

I feel like they have to spend time with each other, so I started walking away from them. I went back to my seat earlier and saw nurse Kate looking at the sketch pad that she gave me.

I cursed myself when I remembered it's content as I hurriedly get it away from her when I approached her side. I tried hiding all the content but it seems to be too late for that, she already saw it.

"You like her don't you?" nurse Kate teased me as she assisted me to sit down on the bench. "What are you talking about?" I scoffed trying to deny it at all cost and acting innocent.

"You know, Sana... Oh Jungkook, don't you dare to deny it from me. I could clearly read you..." she said as I felt my cheeks lit up as I sighed. "Fine, you won... I like her, now so what?" I said as she smiled widely.

"See I was right, you wouldn't have a sketch pad full of her faces if you don't like her. You are one of a easy to read creature Jungkook. You're no longer a baby bunny, you are growing into adolescent." she said as I shoot her glares that made her quiet.

"What are you going to do? You are bound to be discharged two weeks from now..." she suddenly said breaking the silence. As it reminded me of the short time that I can spend with her.

Since I had a fast recovery, I am already bounded to be discharged. The doctor said that after a week, I will be able to walk without crutches anymore.

"I don't know, nurse... Honestly I want to tell her but I am afraid that I might break our friendship. And afraid that maybe she doesn't feel the same at all." I said as I watched her talk to her friend happily.

"Better think of a way young man... Your time here is almost over, I advise that you better tell her. Who knows." she said as she get up the bench leaving me in a deep thought.

"Yeah, who knows that she might only think of me as her friend. I don't want to be rejected but I also want to tell her the truth about my feelings. But I don't know how...

"This war of hormone inside of me is giving a big toll in my head. I don't know what to do anymore..." I frustratedly said as I flipped through the sketch pad that I had in my hand.

I sighed as I looked at her image that I drew using a pencil. I think, I know what I should do I said to myself as I watched her again from afar while she was smiling genuinely.

It's now or never Jungkook! I said to myself as I decided to confess to her on the day of my discharge from the hospital. I will definitely confess to her that day, I promise to myself.