This is something that's been really getting to me lately. I don't know who I am. There are so many versions of me. I change all the time. I think that's why I chase relationships so much. Being single means I have to be me. I don't know who I am. In a relationship I get to be somebody. That's the high. Having a temporary identity. Having new likes and dislikes, new interests. Sure I have music and interests that I've had my whole life. Though the more I analyze it, the more I see that I didn't come to like those things because I liked them. I like those things because I built a memory with another person around those things. My favorite bands. They became my favorite bands because they were whoever I was trying to get to like me at the times favorite bands. My favorite movies and shows are usually ones I've watched with someone or from my childhood. It's that way with every single thing about me. In the beginning it's such a rush. Being this new shiny person. Then the paint starts to wear off and I'm realizing that I can't keep this up anymore. This isn't who I am. Who am I? What version of myself is the real Me? How will I ever know when I'm me and not just the 9 criteria of Borderline or whoever I'm infatuated with at the time? I'm a shell. I'm empty. That's why I need someone else to fill me up with Self Identity. (That's what she said).
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The Girl With A Broken Mind
Random*Adult Content* I'm turning my blog/diary into a book. They are basically diary postings without the dates. They are random postings about whatever I'm feeling that day. Very raw, very detailed about my life. My blog and now this book is to help peo...
